18091842] MARRIAGE 29 



love and hearty gratitude to her for accepting such a one Letter 9 

 as myself. 



I determined when last at Maer to try my chance, but I 

 hardly expected such good fortune would turn up for me. I 

 shall be in town in the middle or latter end of the ensuing 

 week. 1 I fear you will say I might very well have left my 

 story untold till we met. But I deeply feel your kindness 

 and friendship towards me, which in truth I may say, has been 

 one chief source of happiness to me, ever since my return to 

 England : so you must excuse me. I am well sure that 

 Mrs. Lyell, who has sympathy for every one near her, will give 

 me her hearty congratulations. 



Believe me my dear Lyell 



Yours most truly obliged 



CHAS. DARWIN. 



To Emma Wedgwood. Letter 10 



Sunday Night. Athenzeum. [Jan. 2Oth, 1839.] 



... 1 cannot tell you how much I enjoyed my Maer 

 visit, I felt in anticipation my future tranquil life : how I do 

 hope you may be as happy as I know I shall be : but it 

 frightens me, as often as I think of what a family you have 

 been one of. I was thinking this morning how it came, that 

 I, who am fond of talking and am scarcely ever out of spirits, 

 should so entirely rest my notions of happiness on quietness, 

 and a good deal of solitude : but I believe the explanation is 

 very simple and I mention it because it will give you hopes, 

 that I shall gradually grow less of a brute, it is that during the 

 five years of my voyage (and indeed I may add these two 

 last) which from the active manner in which they have been 

 passed, may be said to be the commencement of my real life, 

 the whole of my pleasure was derived from what passed in 

 my mind, while admiring views by myself, travelling across 

 the wild deserts or glorious forests or pacing the deck of the 

 poor little Beagle at night. Excuse this much egotism, I give 

 it you because I think you will humanize me, and soon teach 

 me there is greater happiness than building theories and 

 accumulating facts in silence and solitude. My own dearest 



1 Mr. Darwin was married on Jan. 29th, 1839 (see Life and Letters^ 

 I., p. 299). The present letter was written the day after he had become 

 engaged- 



