FAKE WEATHER FORECASTS. 5° 7 



other January periods. Electric storms, very high tides and seismic 

 shakes are among the probable phenomena at this time. A regular 

 Vulcan storm period covers the 6th to the 12th, being central with 

 moon's last quarter on the 9th. This period lies near the center of the 

 Venus period on the 12th. As we enter this period the weather will 

 again moderate ; winds will shift to southerly and easterly ; the barom- 

 eter will fall in western extremes, and general storms will organize and 

 pass in regular order from west to east from about the 8th to the 12th. 

 The first stages of these storms will most likely prove moderate and 

 rainy, but as the high barometer pushes into the low areas from the 

 northwest, look for high winter gales, blizzards of blockading snow and 

 sleet and a severe, dangerous, cold wave. If the barometer is very 

 low in the far south at this time, the cold wave will not stop short of 

 the Gulf Coast. Watch your barometer as far south as Florida. If 

 it is very low, keep your eye on any ' high ' that may head that way 

 from the northwest." In other words, the cold wave depends upon the 

 relative distribution of air pressure, and it will be cold or warm, clear 

 or rain or snow, according to the prevailing atmospheric conditions. 

 And how are we to know these all-important prevailing atmospheric 

 conditions without the reports of the U. S. Weather Bureau? How 

 can you watch your barometer as far south as Florida, and keep your 

 eye on any ' high ' that may head that way from the northwest without 

 these telegraphic reports? Neither Venus nor moon nor Vulcan has 

 yet vouchsafed to send them by the wireless system. 



I will not follow the month's forecast in detail further, but I chal- 

 lenge the reader to go through the whole two columns, and arrive at 

 any conclusion in the predetermination of the weather for any day in 

 any particular locality. Is it the same whether you are on the Pacific 

 coast, in the Rocky Mountain region, the upper or lower Mississippi 

 Valley or in the New England states? — the oracle and the prophet 

 sayeth not. 



Summarized, the prediction would read about as follows : Wind and 

 rain turning to gales and blizzards the 2nd, 3rd and 4th (a day sooner 

 or later) ; followed immediately by extremely cold weather (dates and 

 regions not given) ; moderating weather, winds shifting to southerly 

 and easterly, general storms organizing and passing in regular order 

 from west to east, the 6th to the 12th ; look for high winter gales, bliz- 

 zards, blockading snow and sleet, and a severe, dangerous, cold wave 

 (date and place uncertain) ; moderation of the cold and return of 

 cloudiness and more rain and snow, the 14th, 15th and 16th; prolonged 

 disturbed and threatening weather the 17th; rising temperature and 

 winter storms, 18th to the 23rd; winter thunder and lightning the 

 19th; snow and blizzards, the 20th to the 23rd; cold relaxing, cloudi- 

 ness gathering in the west and more rain and snow passing eastward, 



