178 THE TABLE D^HOTK. 



hash, or the memorable adventure of the goolistan. His nasal organ 

 constantly emitted such appaling sounds, that, as my uncle passed his 

 dormitory, humanity induced him to explore their cause ; on entering, 

 he found that Mr. Blunt had yielded to the triple influence of terror, 

 surfeit, and exhaustion; on his pillow, lay The Young Man's Best 

 Companion, and by his bed-side a dish of strawberries and cream, in 

 case his old antagonist, his appetite, should assail him, in a wakeful 

 interval. While Mrs. Blunt, who was a woman of ceremonious piety, 

 when even in her cups (which shows the force of habit), had fallen fast 

 asleep with a jovial jorum at her elbow, holding in her hands the Bible 

 upside down, preparatory to her reading the appointed lessons of the 

 evening. 



My uncle's kind intentions were productive of much immediate 

 terror and ulterior confusion to Mr. Blunt ; in a state of questionable 

 wakefulness, he confessed his sins and begged for mercy ; called on 

 Mrs. Blunt and Ensign Sullivan, and pursued, as he endeavoured to 

 raise himself, a kind of gallimaufry, in which it was hard to say, 

 whether his afflictions proceeded more from stomach, conscience, or 

 imagination. Eventually he sat in bed bolt upright, and rubbing his 

 eyes, inquired, with a stare of vacancy, what all this was about ? My 

 uncle, seeing that no offices on his part were required, withdrew at the 

 very moment the Oxonians were brought into the house in a state of 

 violent dispute with two of their compatriots ; they had been taking 

 what they called " a lark," and their bird had been purveyed with 

 rather an unpleasant condiment. It appeared that one of them had 

 been offended at being called a Frenchman ; an insult I should much 

 incline to doubt, as they had so much national tenacity about them, 

 that they invariably got drunk for the sake of contradistinction; an 

 excellent and effectual method, when abroad, of avoiding the disgraceful 

 suspicion of being a sober and well-behaved native of the continental 

 soil. 



On his return home, my uncle reflected on the events of the day. 

 He had borne the same society for three round months, in hope ; that 

 hope was disappointed. This was a species of communion he could 

 endure no longer. He felt as a high-minded Englishman should feel, 

 that the national character was degraded by such exhibitions of ignorance, 

 vulgarity, and outrage; and he determined on the possession of a 

 chateau, which he had already seen ; the particulars of which we design 

 for a future, though not remote, occasion. 



