TO RICHMOND. 423 



him with our smiles. He is not a favourite with our party; I don't 

 know why, except that he is very stupid. Tomlins makes pretensions 

 to Miss Fatima Smith, but with very little chance of success. Miss 

 Smith will become a Mrs. T., but it will be Mrs. Twaddell, not Tom- 

 lins, if I know her heart. " By the by, where shall we dine ?" said 

 Jones. " Yes, where shall we dine?" cried all. I saw that he had the 

 sense of the company with him, so I replied, " Where you please." 

 " Why not here?" he rejoined. We were at that moment in sight of a 

 lovely lawn, that ran with an easy slope down to the water's edge. It 

 was one o'clock the place was propitious and the labours of the morn- 

 ing had whetted our appetites to the keenest edge. I was not, there- 

 fore, taken by surprise, when I heard the four exclaim, as with one 

 voice, " Here we dine!" I immediately rounded the rudder for land, 

 and in a minute we touched the shore, and all hands leaped on the lawn. 

 The ladies, the giblet-pies, bottled porter, and sherry, were landed in a 

 giffy; and while a detachment was sent out to select a pleasant spot for 

 our spot, Jones was as active as a harlequin, in unpacking and preparing 

 all things. A delightful nook in a quickset hedge, and under a shady 

 elm, was marked out for the happy occasion ; and every thing being in 

 no time removed to it, a clean cloth was spread on the green turf; the 

 pies, bread, salt, knives and forks, plates, glasses, and every thing was 

 in apple-pie order the word was given, " to your places," the ladies 

 were handed to their's, and down we all squatted,, like a Turkish dinner- 

 party, hunger and expectation being remarkable in every countenance. 



" Jones," I directed, " cut up the pie." " With all the pleasure in 

 life," he promptly replied, and began to operate. " A cursed hard 

 crust to begin with, and as thick as the Serpentine in skating season," 

 remarked Jones, as he grinned and groaned, and vainly endeavoured to 

 make an impression upon its outworks. " Never mind its hardness," 

 said I. (Miss Fatima Smith had made it with her own fair hands.) 

 " I shall venture on it." " Yes," said Smith, (l it will bear you." 

 (Roars of laughter.) " Upon my soul," said Jones, " I cannot cut into 

 it my hands are so tender." This set the ladies giggling, and then he 

 threw down the knife and fork in a pet. " Here, hand the pie to me/' 

 said Smith ; and, oh, monstrous ! he made no more ado, but jobbed his 

 elbow upon the cone of the crust, which broke it in sure enough, but at 

 the same time sent half the gravy with a spirt into our eyes, all over 

 Wilson's white waistcoat, and down Miss Simpson's black satin spencer. 

 "You awkward fellow!" exclaimed his sisters; and they blushed as 

 beautifully as Aurora. " Oh, never mind my spencer," said Miss 

 Simpson : " I don't care about my waistcoat," said Wilson, " since we 

 have got at the giblets, which I had given up in despair." We then 

 laughed heartily, and heartily we ate. I never saw, at a Guildhall 

 dinner, such appetites and such expedition. As for Jones, he might -eat 

 his way up to the civic chair, with any man in the city who has not yet 

 arrived at that honour : for a young liveryman, his performance was 

 wonderful, and his promise more. In ten minutes the eatables were 

 hors du combat ; and one bottle of porter, and three of sherry, were all 

 that was left of the drinkables. Filling a bumper of sherry, I then gave 

 from the chair (the stump of a tree) " The ladies, our fair compagnons 

 de voyage!" (Drank with three times three, and one cheer morer-a miss- 

 Jire of Wilson's.) Jones was then called upon for a song : he complied, 

 and struck up 



