THE MARGATE HOY. 435 



anatomy, physiology, and even pathology, from that respected theatre 

 of universal science, the tailor's board. 



Remember, reader, we are now treating of the theory of the profes- 

 sion, free from all allusion to the humble " acupuncturist." 



" Mens agitat molem." 



How the soul springs with intoxicating elasticity, at the bare thought 

 of such towering ambition in the profession ! Heaven forefend that any 

 modern Brutus should attempt to sink the planetary splendour of its mem- 

 bers, in premature assassination. Long had the trenchant " shears " of 

 the profession cut deeply into mathematics and geometry, as was evinced 

 by the delicate graduation of the " measuring tape," the laboured formula 

 for readily ascertaining angular calculations : the special application of 

 spherical trigonometry was impressively indicated, a knowledge of the 

 sine, co-sine, tangent periphery, and cylindrical accuracy, were glaringly 

 indispensable. As decidedly was a sufficient knowledge of botany 

 peremptorily called for, as applied to the fostering culture of that deli- 

 cate exotic, the " cabbage." Now, however, the art is reaching its 

 climax. An interview, during which an order for a coat or waistcoat 

 used to be given in former days, is now converted into an anatomical 

 lecture : physiological discussions are necessarily entered into, to ac- 

 count for this or that variety of structure or shape. In fact, the " tailor 

 is now abroad;" therefore the ft schoolmaster" may go home as soon as 

 he pleases. 



The captain of the vessel, the steersman, the steward, and the working 

 department, were inundated with questions, remarks, and rejoinders, 

 varying, in intensity of interest, according with the profundity and 

 acquirements of each party, in philosophy, mechanism, meteorology, 

 and even in the ornithology of the ocean. 



Practical efforts were making, by here and there a cockney hero of the 

 " gut and horse-hair," to catch mackarel or whiting, with hooks baited 

 with lob- worms, or maggots of Islington nativity. The finny tribe of the 

 ocean, however, did not seem to appreciate, or perhaps were not com- 

 petent judges of Islington dainties. On the forecastle was to be seen 

 and heard a notorious terrifier of yellow-hammers and torn-tits, exhi- 

 biting a real Brummagem " Manton gun," which was incessantly dis- 

 charged, to the indisputable benefit of the gunpowder companies, the 

 crying nuisance of the passengers, and the quiet contempt of the loiter- 

 ing sea-gull. Apart was to be seen a sallow, unshaven bird-catcher, in 

 a frousy shooting-jacket, smelling strongly of German-paste and dung- 

 hill worms. He was occupied in feeding, and whistling to, some score 

 or two of well painted, docked and cropped sparrows. More ingenious 

 than the metropolitan wine-merchant, who requires ' two ' qualities of 

 the Cape and Teneriffe grape, with which he is enabled to meet the de- 

 mands of his customers, for wines of any flavour, or age, of any vintage, 

 in any clime ; this humble artist simply demands a solitary but adequate 

 supply of the common sparrow, to produce the most brilliant variety of 

 European songsters. They are always warranted, and offered to be 

 taken in exchange, if they do not sing. What can be possibly fairer 

 than this ? 



Notwithstanding the usual gastric disturbance consequent upon most 

 sailing excursions, even in smooth water, there still assembled at the 



