532 Windlass Hall. [MAY, 



or a ride, one is enabled to provide against every vicissitude of the weather, 

 an advantage of no common value in such a mutable and capricious cli- 

 mate as ours. This is called at the Hall, making your toilette at the 

 Captain's glass ; and nothing is more usual than to hear it observed 

 " The glass is down to great-coat and umbrella," or *' It is up to Russia 

 duck." My poor old friend ! I do not suppose Torricelli valued himself 

 so much on the original invention of the barometer, as the Captain does 

 upon this application of it. 



Nor can I avoid mentioning with applause an apparatus which he calls 

 his " Antiphlogistic Ladder," by means of which, should the Hall ever 

 happen to take fire, he can descend from the windows of his bed-room to 

 the ground a height of some fifty or sixty feet with as much ease as 

 by the staircase ; avoiding at the same time the annoyance (incidental on 

 such occasions to the use of the common ladder) of being roasted by the 

 flames as they burst out of the lower stories. Of this contrivance he is so 

 vain-glorious, that I fear he is not so grateful as he ought to be to Divine 

 Providence, for having never as yet vouchsafed him an opportunity 

 for putting its utility to the test. It has had, however, every trial but 

 the fiery one. The only time it was ever my fortune to witness its " mo- 

 dus operandi," was under circumstances the very reverse of those for 

 which it was intended. It was upon a wet night in February - } and the 

 rain, it seems, having penetrated into the Captain's quarters, the thought 

 suddenly rushed into his mind that the " Antiphlogistic Ladder " might 

 be made as available as a means of escape from flood as from fire 5 ac- 

 cordingly down he came, trundling, in a thing that resembled a bucket, 

 along the side of the house, actually saturated by the water which fell 

 from the eaves and spouts in torrents, and shouting as he descended 

 " An extension of the principle j an extension of the principle !" My 

 bed-room being immediately under his, the working of the ropes and 

 pulleys, with the exclamations that accompanied every step of the opera- 

 tion, did not fail to awaken me 5 and having no doubt but that the Hall 

 was at length on fire, I flung open the window, and calling to the Captain 

 as he passed, asked him in Heaven's name what was the matter where 

 had the flames broken out ? The only reply I could extract, was, " An 

 extension of the principle; an extension of the principle !" This, however, 

 was enough for one who knew his habits so well as I did 5 I saw at once 

 that, rough as the night was, my good old friend was enjoying a ride on 

 his hobby so I pulled down the window, and returned to bed. 



It is interesting to observe how the ruling propensity of the Captain's 

 mind colours every part of his conduct, not only in his private, but in his 

 public capacity. As a magistrate, he is continually exposing himself to 

 the ridicule of the " quorum," by the occasions which he takes of exhi- 

 biting his mechanical turn, even in the administration of justice. In 

 criminal cases he is always for the punishment of the tread-mill, which, he 

 observes, is an elegant application of the principles of natural philosophy 

 to jurisprudence. When a poacher is brought before him, he investigates 

 rigorously the manner in which the fellow has killed or taken the game j 

 and if he finds that he has employed any novel or ingenious device, he is 

 never known to pronounce a severe sentence. A peasant who catches a 

 hare in a trap of his own construction will, perhaps, be dismissed with a 

 lectureon the misapplication of the noble talents God has given him ; but 

 let him be convicted of knocking the animal down with a stick, and he is 



