THE RECORDER OF BALLYPOREEN. *]5 



confusion that environed their respective residences in the course of 

 that day, individually promised to support the man who was upheld 

 by so " respectable, influential, and independent a body of voters." 

 If then the joy was great, when the procession marched out from 

 Ballyporeen, it was actually uproarious on its return. Hall, like 

 other candidates in similar circumstances, promised every thing. He 

 promised old Switzer that he would " learn to write in a week ;" and 

 he assured every one of the multitude that they might go to law as 

 long as they lived, for he would never charge them sixpence for " a 

 process," or " a decree," though they were litigating with the entire 

 county of Tipperary. Thus far all went on well and prosperously ; 

 the " Irish" were defeated ; all the tricks and maneuvering of Hogan 

 were rendered abortive ; and Hall was " almost the same" as invested 

 in the high and mighty office of recorder of the important and here- 

 after-to-be-celebrated town of Ballyporeen. 



The corporal was one of those bibulous individuals who, on every 

 occasion of life, can find an excuse for imbibing any given quantity 

 of liquid stronger than water. If his spirits were low if they were 

 high if he met a friend, or quarrelled with an enemy if he were 

 hungry, or had eaten if he were running, or walking, or sitting if 

 it were morning, or noon, or night if it were summer or winter, 

 windy or calm, wet or dry, cool or hot --each and every occasion was 

 a reason, and an excellent one too, for the corporal to take a glass of 

 whiskey, a pint of porter, or as much potteen as you could give him. 

 A trifling occurrence required a glass ; an unforeseen event, two of 

 them ; an accident, three ; and any extraordinary circumstance was 

 to be drunk ad libitum. Such were Hall's maxims such his rule of 

 life : and to do him justice, he was a most consistent candidate : he 

 was never known to violate the one, nor depart from the other. His 

 promised elevation gave him the excuse for stopping at every shebeen 

 house on his way home, and " seeing his friends drink ;" and in 

 order that they might be induced to do so, he most readily gave them 

 the proper example. In drinking success to the " constitution/' he 

 lost his own ; and the innumerable toasts to " his health" cut him off 

 ff in the flower of his youth." The progress of his inebriation upon 

 that evening might be thus marked : on his return, when five miles 

 from Ballyporeen, he was drunk at four miles distance he was very 

 drunk at three miles excessively drunk when within two miles he 

 was stupidly drunk and by the time he had reached the outskirts of 

 the village he could not lie on the floor without holding ! His com- 

 panions were worthy of such a leader there was not one of them 

 perfectly sober all differed in degree from the merely tipsy to the 

 corporal's standard of intoxication. In this plight did the gallant 

 heroes return to Ballyporeen ; but how different was the reception 

 that awaited them to the adieus with which they had set forward ! 



If there be one place in the world, where the sister of Mars has, 

 since the deposition of the heathen deities, been allowed to rule, that 

 place, I believe to be Ireland. In no other country but Ireland does 

 she exercise so universal a sway ; for she is seldom able, except here, 

 to rouse up men to quarrel with each other, when they congregate 

 together for the purposes of pleasure or amusement. Horace says, " it 

 is Thracian like, to use the sword in the midst of feasting," had he 



