524 THE WALHAM WAG. 



looking down the road as if they was a waiting for the milkman or 

 summat, while all the time the lazy wagabones is doing nothing but 

 dawdling to see my coach pass. Now you'll please to notice how I'll 

 make 'em front about. The nearest this here chap to the left, is 

 Mr. Burchell's Pompey ( I say Inky-face" did ee see how he 

 turned ? Now for t'other ; ' Hollo ! Alabaster what's lignum 

 whitey ?' There he knows his name, because for why ? Alabaster 

 and Inkey-face is all one black and white being the same thing. 

 Some people calls me ' Gipsey,' because I'm brownish and others 

 knows me by the name of ' Lilly white/ for the same reason. But 

 dash my rags, if here an't some o' the Royal family notice the coach- 

 man." This gentleman was worthy of notice ; his livery coat was in- 

 tensely scarlet ; his complexion crimson, his eye lurid and blood-shot. 

 My companion hallooed to him in stentorian tones as the two vehicles 

 passed each other, " Why coachee ! you looks if you'd been put in a 

 smith's forge, and blorved red-hot." 



" Jem, I must ride with you again : set me down at the top of 

 Fulham town/' 



" Thankye, sir, but afore we reaches the corner, talking of jokes, 

 I'll make bold to tell you the best joke I knows. One night, 

 'twas my last journey, I'd just stepped into Jermyn-street to get a 

 go of Kennet ale, to wash down my wittles, while my wehicle was 

 at the cellar ; when, as I was coming back, I puts up my foot on a 

 stone what propped a post in St. James's-street, to tie my shoe. 

 Well, it so happened, that just then, some nobleman, who'd lost all 

 he had, as I should think, at one of the club-houses, comes along, 

 chock full of fury, without having nobody to abuse when he sees 

 me bent double with my back towards him. So mind me, we'd 

 no acquaintance, it was the first time we met he takes a bit of a 

 run and gives me a kick behind what sends me bang into the middle 

 of the road, saying, says he, ( D n you ! you're always tying that 

 shoe !' " 



" Well ! and what did you do ?" 



" I laughed fit to split my sides ; for thinks I, he's lost his tin ; 

 and supposing I'd been regularly cleaned out at a club-house, and set 

 eyes on a coachman, what I'd never seen afore, a-tying his shoe 

 under a lamp-post, / should have made so free as to kick him into 

 the middle of the road, saying, says I, ' D n you ! you're always 

 tying that shoe of your's !' Now, that to my fancy, is a joke/' 



