452 NOTES OF THE MONTH. 



so much trouble ? why, armed and mounted, do you scour the country 

 in search of feathered caitiffs ? By a single word the objects of your 

 wrath might have been secured and brought to you in cages, and in 

 your easy-chair might you have taken them out and comfortably 

 wrung their necks, with all the practical dexterity of a poulterer's 

 apprentice. Such a proceeding would have deteriorated from the 

 merit of your deeds. But who hints at inglorious ease to the soul of 

 a hero? One who in eight hours can destroy two hundred and 

 twenty living creatures ! whose noble ardour would only allow him 

 to snatch half an hour from this bloody business for luncheon! What 

 a noble and industrious candidate is here lost for a Newgate slaugh- 

 ter-house, where talents for destruction is tested by time! What 

 would Michael Scales give for such an operation ? 



Such sport and such sportsmen sickens us with the very name. 

 Butchering against time is the business of professional slaughtermen, 

 and any gentleman who can take pleasure in such occupations has 

 the heart of a ruffian. Battues and such bloody matches have been 

 introduced into England by foreigners, and have no manly or Eng- 

 lish feeling belonging to them. Any man who is not satisfied with 

 his fair bagful of game is an amateur bourrcau, and would not scruple 

 to earn his bread by the halter. 



SCOTCH CORPS OF UNITED TRENCHERMEN. On Monday, the 

 14th ult., the members of this distinguished company, which includes 

 nearly the entire population of Edinburgh, honoured the grand 

 Edinburgh dinner with their presence, to testify, by an extraordinary 

 exhibition of their matchless masticatory eloquence, their high sense of 

 the importance of the occasion for which they were met together, and of 

 the high character of the Statesman, whose visit the dinner was meant 

 to celebrate. In what manner these gentlemen acquitted themselves, 

 we will quote the report of a morning paper to describe : 



" The dinner, which was a cold one, was placed upon the tables long 

 before the company took their seats. Some time before the dinner hour, all 

 the upper places were occupied ; and long before the arrival of the distin- 

 guished visitors, the tables were full. It was then that a scene ensued, 

 which, to the eyes of Southrons, seemed singular enough. The effect of 

 the delicacies (cold beef and salad) upon Scotch appetites, rendered doubly 

 keen by previous abstinence, begun to exhibit itself by sundry signs and 

 tokens. Carniverous glances at the viands, and furtive abstractions of 

 stray pieces, plainly told the state of matters. Huge slices begun to dis- 

 appear without the assistance of fork or plate, until success emboldening 

 enterprise, the work of demolition became pretty general. It was here 

 that a gentleman, who has been in London, and by some strange accident 

 had come back again, leaped upon one of the tables, and intreated his 

 countrymen to desist, appealing most energetically to their honour as Scotch- 

 men. Whether it was the oddness of the nature of the appeal, or the man- 

 ner of the orator, it is hard to say ; but it was acknowledged by bursts of 

 laughter, and, as if it were a signal, there arose such a clang of knives and 

 forks, never before equalled in the ' memory of the oldest inhabitant.' 

 In twelve minutes, not the vestige of an eatable remained upon the tables ; 

 the skewers were cut up into toothpicks, and, with that fellowship for which 

 Scotchmen are so remarkable, were kindly passed from one to the other. 



