NOTES OF THE MONTH. 



duty; for during the last seven years of his sublunary existence he 

 was accustomed to slacken the fires of his inward man with no less 

 than fourteen quarts of water daily ! He should assuredly be canon- 

 ized by the lovers of intemperance ; for if this be abstemiousness, we 

 think it is a case of most absorbing interest to all concerned. Eyekill 

 was appropriately interred at Fullbourne ; but would he not have im- 

 measurably enhanced his reputation had he sacrificed himself at the 

 lordly conflagration at Westminster he would have " dropped like 

 gentle dew from heaven" on the igneous embers of St. Stephens. 



BASE IMITATORS. Our American brethren, who contrived to keep 

 pace with our temperance antics in an inverse ratio, have lately be- 

 come enamoured of self-denial to such a degree, as to dispense with 

 wine in the sacrament of communion. When the gentry, whose 

 meddling empiricism has succeeded in unhinging the machinery of 

 every-day life, have so long exhibited themselves independent of 

 common sense, it is time for those who are not so heroically consti- 

 tuted to cease to wonder at these marvels. We would venture, how- 

 ever, to suggest to all who are ambitious of the reputation of pro- 

 digies, that fetes in the starvation way would be quite unique just 

 now. Let any man ensconce himself for fourteen days on the top of 

 the Monument, regaling his epigastric with the sight of civic demo- 

 litions of edibles, and we promise him a six months' immortality from 

 the next general attenuation bill he submits to the collective wisdom. 



A FRIENDLY LIFT. An Irish journal, altogether emancipated 

 from obligation to Locke or Murray, announces, with no little gratu- 

 lation, the amount of the O'Connell rent for the present year. With 

 an enviable happiness of diction sufficiently pointed to be almost epi- 

 grammatic, it exultingly declares that the county, beatified with its 

 lucubrations, " contributed nearly one- twelfth of the gross collection !" 

 What a delicate inuendo is conveyed to the genius of Derrynane by 

 the word in italics ! though the " hereditary bondsman" who wrote 

 it modestly neglected to underscore it GROSS COLLECTION ! This is, 

 indeed, killing with kindness, after the true Irish fashion. We ap- 

 prehend that the idol of the finest peasantry will strenuously pray for 

 a deliverance from his friends. 



An admirer of a certain naval writer finishes an elaborate encomium 

 by designating his author " a prose Crabbe." This is nautical pane- 

 gyric we presume. It sounds oddly. In the ordinary acceptation of 

 the words, " a prose crab," conveys nothing particularly lively this 

 fishing for pet phrases is amusing. 



DISTANCE BETWEEN FRIENDS. If there be any class of person- 

 ages this side of the Tweed who successfully emulate the caw-me caw- 

 thee doctrines of Auld Reekie, it is that of the clergy and the magis- 

 trates. As the exception proves the rule, we find at the last Middle- 

 sex sessons, a gentleman paid for keeping the peace deliver himself 

 thus to a publican, who sought a renewal of his license : " The 

 clergymen who signed the recommendation are men more fond of 



