514 MONTHLY REVIEW OF LITERATURE* 



parasites will find useful, and that is, always to set off the savouriness of a 

 good dish against the unsavouriness of a remark, and the smiles of a well- 

 covered table against the frowns and sneers of the presiding Amphitryon and 

 the rest of the company. ' The marquis calls me a fool/ said an abbe, a finished 

 master of the art ; ' but I am not such a fool as to quarrel with his pdte-defoie 

 gras.' 



" A man of this humour may do a great deal in the way of dining out, par*- 

 ticularly in some countries on the continent, where each wealthy family keeps 

 a sort of an open table one day in the week. Nothing more therefore is neces- 

 sary to dine well every day, than to get a footing in seven houses having dif- 

 ferent feast-days ; but we believe the more experienced and successful of these 

 diners-out do not consider themselves well provided for unless they have nine 

 or ten families to count upon, which leaves them two or three as a corps de 

 reserve, in case of sickness, death, bankruptcy, or the like, in any of the other 

 houses. ' Our day is Thursday,' said a good dinner-giver in our hearing ; 'but 

 you can't dine with us, as it is your day at the duchess's.' 



" ' I beg your pardon,' replied the parasite, ' the duchess has got the quinsy, 

 and my Thursdays will be disengaged for two or three weeks to come.' 



" ' Then come and make penitence with us.' 



" The Abbe C . In our time an old abbe carried this art, ' di 



scroccare pranzi,' to its utmost perfection ; and he knew every man and 

 woman that ever gave a good dinner. He kept a correct register of all the 

 dishes for which each house was celebrated, and of the days when they were 

 likely to have the best dinners. A diner maigre, or repast without meat, is a 

 serious thing with all gourmets, as it is exquisite, mediocre, or detestable, ac- 

 cording to the science of the cook and the taste of his masters. Our abbe 



had therefore taken note, ' always to dine with the duke di C- and the 



Countess R- on Fridays and Saturdays, and oftener during Lent, because 



their diners maigres are the best !" He had also established a gossiping ac- 

 quaintance with every cook of any distinction, and would generally contrive 

 to learn from them what was in cogitation for the day's or the morrow's din- 

 ner. We met him one morning perplexed in the extreme : " Timpano of mac- 

 caroni with Abruzzi truffles, at Don Domenico's ; red mullets and pheasants 

 from Persano, at the baron's ! Which shall I prefer ? 



" But the manner in which he cajoled and kept in good favour with the cooks, 

 who, in the south of Italy are now, as in the days of the great Apicius, very 

 frequently Sicilians, was truly admirable. 



*" In tempo degli anticlii Romani in the times of the ancient Romans,' he 

 would say, 'the Sicilians were the first cooks in the world. Cuoco Siciliano, 

 that was enough! And they are the best cooks still. Ah, yes ! the Sicili- 

 ans were always a people of genius ! and di grazia, Master Antonio, couldn't 

 ye contrive to send up a double dish of chickens' livers the next time I dine at 

 the house ?' 



' If good dinners could have kept a man alive, the abbe would have lived for 

 ever; but, alas! it was not so, and one day he died. A wit composed his 

 epitaph in Italian doggerel rhyme, the sense of which may be thus rendered 

 into English : 



" ' Here lies the abbe, who lived seventy years and odd. And what in se* 

 venty years and odd did he do ? He ate more good dinners for nothing than 

 any man that ever lived, but at last he paid for a dinner and itchoaked him.' 



" He was certainly a great man in his way, though not particularly distin- 

 guished out of it. One of the best of his sayings was the following : 



"'It is a vulgar error to say, that where there is dinner for two, thereis 

 dinner enough for three : it ought to be, where there is dinner for three, 

 there is perhaps enough for two.' 



" Cook versus Chaplain. The Prince di , at whose table this prince of pa- 



