IN THE MIDDLE CLASSES OF ENGLAND. 497 



you sent to school at so premature an age ? for I should think that 

 not more than eighteen summers have flown over your head." 



*' Thereabouts, Sir, yes, I was sent from home to a very fashion- 

 able school when I was eight years of age, and only left twelve 

 months ago." 



" Ah, that was indeed early ! and pray what course of education 

 can it be which requires so extended a pupillage ? why, you must be 

 as learned as a professor ; a simple man like myself must appear a 

 perfect ignoramus in your eyes." 



" Ah, I can really hardly tell you what I learnt ; the branches of 

 study in our school were so numerous, and I have left it now so long, 

 that J fear I cannot even enumerate them." 



" You jest, my sweet lady what, twelve months, arid all for- 

 gotten ! Why, your sex must be the same all the world over 

 delighting in deceit." 



" It is true, however : let me see if I can recollect what I learnt : 

 there was music, French, Italian, German, Spanish, Latin, astro- 

 nomy, mathematics, dancing, singing, botany, geology, history, 

 drawing, painting, elocution, riding, walking, sitting, standing, man- 

 ners, archery, philosophy, and some other things I cannot call to 

 mind." 



" Upon my honour, a very sufficient catalogue ; and what you 

 have overlooked are the useful portions of female education, doubt- 

 less, the brilliant generally predominating over the useful in a wo- 

 man's head ; for example, to aid your memory, you have omitted 

 sewing, knitting, cutting-out dresses, pie and pudding making, the 

 management of servants, setting on buttons, and the general duties of 

 housewifery." 



" Oh lud, Sir ! why, you are a perfect Goth ; and as bad as my 

 late grandfather, who asked me as an especial favour to knit him a 

 pair of woollen mittens, when I returned from school. It was so 

 ridiculous I did not know how to set on a stitch, that I laughed 

 most heartily : and will you believe it ? he was so ill-natured as to 

 alter his will, and leave all his property to one of those nasty places 

 called hospitals wasn't it ill-natured now?" 



" Perhaps it was, as far as you are concerned, as you have been the 

 victim of a particular system. But pray what have you retained, or 

 what do you intend to retain, of all the heap of useless learning, as 

 I am compelled to call it ? " 



" Oh fye ! but really, I have already forgotten all about it except 

 my music, and a little drawing, painting, and my dancing." 



" In these accomplishments I can bear witness your tutelage has 

 not been in vain ; and for the rest, I suppose it is the fashion to run 

 through the routine ; and I venture to hope that since you have been 

 freed from such a senseless thraldom, you have occupied yourself in 

 that best of all female seminaries home, and under that best of 

 teachers a mother, in fitting yourself for the important duties of the 

 mistress of a household, of a wife, and of a mother." 



" Oh shocking, you quizzing creature ! why, I learnt all the 

 fine things just for the very purpose of getting a husband." 



" Then I presume, since you were removed from home the pro- 



