THE HANDSOME MODEL. 89 



of the Venus Callipyga. I said to myself, ' she will sit, and we shall have 

 children who will sit ! It is hereditary in my family. My father sat for his 

 arms, my mother for her hips, my uncle for his feet, my aunt for her back, 

 my brother for his hands, and my sister for her ears/ When I was courting 

 my wife, I said to her, ' Before we are knit in indissoluble bonds, I give you 

 fai'r notice that I shall require my wife to sit no matter for what, and my 

 children idem.'' To which she replied, ' My friend, I will do every thing 

 you please.' Perfidious wretch! deceitful staymaker ! Madame Rossignol 

 threw dust in my eyes when I say dust in my eyes, c'est une fapon de parler . 

 How was I imposed upon ! Impossible she could sit for the smallest thing ! 

 Nothing but cotton from the crown of her head to the sole of her foot ! I 

 would have quitted her for want of symmetry, but she was enceinte, and I 

 hoped the child would atone for my disappointment. In fact, I had a son 

 beautiful as an Apollo ! quite in my own style ! He will be one of the finest 

 models in Europe. As soon as the rogue was three years old, I wished to 

 exercise him in standing but there was no keeping him quiet 'a moment ! 

 I made use of a cat-o'- nine-tails to calm the vivacity of his blood ; and my 

 wife had recourse to a broomstick to defend her son, whom she pretended I 

 made cry. As these conjugal scenes were repeated every day, and made no 

 little noise, the Commissaire du Quartier found fault with my mode of in- 

 structing my son, and desired me to leave him to develope himself. This 

 decided me. I have ever since lived en garpon, and I never go near my wife 

 except when I imagine she has some little superfluity, of which she wishes 

 to be disembarrassed " 



As Rossignol finished speaking, we heard a great noisa in the direction of 

 the kitchen, and I recognized Theresa's voice, crying " Oh it is him, I am 

 certain! This rascally Rossignol has made some excuse for leaving his 

 sitting, and has made his way to my kitchen but I will complain to my 

 master things shan't disappear this way, and every thing be laid to my 

 poor Mouton." 



" It is the old woman," said Rossignol, who had been listening ; " she is 

 coming here. Oh ! what an idea ! Whilst my patron is out I could ex- 

 actly quite a scene in a play the old woman is easily frightened. Quick, 

 my little fellow down on your knees there, before the layman a helmet on 

 your head, the vizor lowered a tunic over your shoulders and don't stir 



for your life." ' But, sir." " No buts." " What for " " No what 



fors you have nothing to say play the layman it is only that she may 

 not know you it won't be long but I advise you not to speak, for if you 

 do, I will break Hannibal's sword over your back." I was not afraid of M. 

 Rossignol, but I was curious to see what he would do. Having been so long 

 confined to my room, I was not sorry of a prospect of some fun. Besides, I 

 took it for granted that it was all meant as a joke, and that M. Dermilly 

 would not be displeased. Behold me then on my knees near the lay figure. 

 Rossignol thrust a helmet on my head, the vizor of which fell over my face, 

 and threw a large piece of yellow silk over my body. Being completely dis- 

 guised, he had nothing to do but to think of himself. I saw him run to the 

 skeleton, which he took in his arms, and bore in front of a large chest which 

 was in the middle of the room ; he next threw over it an immense brown 

 mantle, which entirely concealed this frightful personage ; then Rossignol 

 squatted down in the chest which was behind the skeleton, letting the lid fall 

 not quite so close but that he could breathe, and hold a covner of the cloak. 

 All this was but the affair of a moment, and every one was at his post when 

 Therese opened the door of the atelier. 



" Things can't go on in this way, sir there must be an end put to it," 

 said Therese, entering and walking slowly towards the side where she sup- 

 posed her master was at work. " M. Rossignol is every day playing me 

 some trick this very morning the rest of the fowl an entire leg and then 



M.M. No. 91.' N 



