22 ANECDOTES OF A DETENU. 



formance of a man, something like the celebrated Mazurier, a kind of 

 boneless, gelatinous fellow ; the farce was Polichinelle Hoi : Punch 

 is represented sitting upon the throne, but he has not a farthing in his 

 treasury. While he is reflecting upon his situation he hears a man 

 crying macaroni in the street: he immediately sends for the vender, 

 and inquires the price of a portion. " Three sous," replies the latter. 

 " Three sous, thou Arabian Jew !" exclaims the king ; " is this the 

 way you extort money from my poor subjects ? Come, give me im- 

 mediately three portions for one sou, or I will cut off your head." 

 The poor man complains that he will be ruined, but he must obey. 

 " Well, well," said his majesty, " you are a devilish good fellow, and 

 I will now allow you to sell macaroni to my subjects for just what 

 you please." The author and actor were forthwith sent to the 

 conciergerie. 



A Crime Unknown in this Country. F , celebrated for his bon 



mots, had a brother who was in the church. One evening, while 

 sitting in company with some of the most fashionable people in Paris, 

 Talleyrand thus addressed him: (f I believe you have a brother?" 

 " Yes." "To what profession does he belong ?" "He is a priest." 

 " How does he spend his time ?" " In the morning he says mass." 

 " And in the evening ?" " In the evening he does not know what 

 he says." 



Beautiful Cow for Smoky Chimnies. When the celebrated Mdlle. 

 George was in high favour with the public, the Theatre Fra^ais was 

 nightly crowded to such an excess that it was with much difficulty 

 sitting room could be obtained. " I have consulted all the fumistes 

 in Paris," said Daru to Talleyrand, " and none of them are able to 

 prevent the chimney of my drawing-room from smoking." It was 

 generally believed that the count had put himself to much incon- 

 venience, by supplying the fascinating actress with large sums of 

 money. " I'll tell you what to do," said Talleyrand, " put George 

 on the top of your chimney, and you may rely upon it she will DRAW." 

 (Vous savez que George attire tout a elle.) 



Religious Economy. Madame de R. was said to be penurious 

 she had led a gay life but when religion was a la mode, she became 

 a devotee. " This lady," said Cardinal Latil to Talleyrand, " per- 

 forms her religious duties with the greatest strictness." " She is 

 highly to be praised," replied the prince, " and the more so that she 

 does not deem it a work of supererogation to take care of the morals 

 of those who compose her household. I am told that she never 

 fails making all her servants fast, at least twice a week." 



The Schoolmaster in France. A cockney detenu, who was residing 

 at Verdun in 1810, kept a little shop : he took it into his head to set 

 up a school, and in his window was to be seen a bill, on which he 

 had written in a cramped, crooked hand, " LEARNS TO READ AND 

 WRITE ! " " That is an honest fellow, at least," said Sir James 

 Lawrence, " I will call next month, and if I find he has made suf- 

 ficient progress I will send my two nephews to his seminary !" 



Unplumed Biped. M. de Jourches, an insufferable, bandy-legged, 

 grey-headed coxcomb, the very quintessence of ugliness, bore a 

 striking resemblance to the bird of Minerva. He was, one evening, 



