102 POUNDS, SHlLLlNCfS, AND PENCE. 



pain — thousands in care — and all in anxiety ! . A stranger, who had 

 never seen more than the few individuals who constituted the inha- 

 bitants of his own village, would wonder what was their object, or 

 whither they could be going. These crowds of young and old, rich 

 and poor, lord and beggar, are all in one mind, pursuing one object — 

 after money, and going to find it. 



The ways and means of acquiring money are nearly as numerous 

 as the persons who practice them ; and when once acquired to ad- 

 vantage, the money is half coined. Were we to enumerate the plans 

 and plots, with their various peculiarities, we might make as many 

 books as would erect a structure equal in magnitude to the great 

 wall of China ; nevertheless there are a few instances and things, 

 which are every day occurrences, which we cannot pass over without 

 relating as the predominant love of " pounds, shillings, and pence." 



Old Jacob Timpley (or as he was universally called in the neigh- 

 bourhood. Master Jacob Timpley, senior,) was landlord of a dirty- 

 looking public-house, in a back street in the smokey town of — ; 



notwithstanding the locality, it was regularly " licensed to sell British ■ 

 and foreign spirits by retail." This said Jacob had acquired a con- 

 siderable fortune by ten thousand " ways and means," and had at 

 times exhibited a great deal of benevolence to the poor creatures 

 who rented the first floor below stairs, in gifts of small beer in cases 

 of illness, and a few halfpence when something stronger was required. 

 Sometimes these miserable creatures, who made most of their cash 

 payable at the bar of Master Jacob, would borrow small loans ; and 

 if they only had the manners to return them, all went on right ; — 

 their "ways and means" of moving Jacob's sympathy were by 

 pleasing his pride, that they might the easier slip into his pocket. 



One morning, while he was (with all due deference to him as a 

 domestic economist) washing his glasses, a little ragged youngster, 

 whose chin rested on the counter, kindly accosted the old gentleman 

 with " If you please. Master Jacob Timpley, senior, mother wishes 

 to know how you are this morning, and if those pills did you any 

 good." 



" Who is your mother ?" asked Jacob. 



" P-p-please, sir, my mother is my mother." 



