308 Dublin, Saiiifs* [MARCH, 



has sat under a plantain, and lectured the natives of Owhyhee on the 

 seven trumpets in the Apocalypse ; while a fifth has made an ice-berg- 

 his pulpit, and preached to the Laplanders the length of a polar day 

 without incurring so much as a chilblain or a cold. Thus they run on, 

 each in a strain of outlandish eloquence peculiar to himself the bulk 

 of their auditory, as we have already seen, are rapt into the third heaven, 

 and fancy they see before them so many evangelists and prophets a 

 few individuals in the throng., less enthusiastic in their temperament, 

 experience somewhat different emotions, and are sometimes tempted to 

 insinuate, that the gentlemen on the platform resemble Quixote and 

 Munchausen, as nearly as Paul and Barnabas. 



But far the most important effect of these singular outpourings is the 

 enormous sum collected at the close of the meeting to send out these 

 religious knights-errant in quest of new adventures. There are morose 

 and discontented individuals, who assert that the silver and gold, paid in 

 each month of April to the men of tracts and missions, and by them 

 lavished in every corner of the earth, might be laid out with equal piety, 

 and greater profit, in one little spot called Ireland, where myriads cry 

 for bread, for raiment, and for knowledge but there are few or none to 

 answer ! The same persons are apt to remind us that Ireland was known 

 by the title of the " Isle of Saints" long before any pious rover, y'clept 

 a missionary, took the bread of her children and cast it to the dogs. 

 In those times, they continue, no Irishman wanted bread that a Ota- 

 heitan might have a Bible, but the necessities of his poor countryman 

 touched the first chord of the rich man's heart ; but now things are 

 changed our charity circumnavigates the globe : in our adventurous 

 zeal for the true faith we eclipse the fame of the Crusaders j we send 

 our emissaries to every clime ; our Bibles are exported to China, our 

 tracts to Timbuctoo ; we pant for the welfare of the Negro, and are 

 full of concern for the immortal interests of the Jews and Turks ; we 

 lavish golden gifts upon all the world j but for Ireland, " a cup of cold 

 water in the name of the Lord/' is the utmost extent of our loving- 

 kindness. So say the cold calculators we allude to ; but what is the 

 tendency of such discourse, but to rob the religious world of its chief 

 felicity and glory ? Is it fair to dwell on the dark side of the picture 

 only to expatiate on the defects, and overlook the beauties of the sys- 

 tem ? Who can be so carnal-minded and senseless as to say, that it is 

 nothing to have those delightful assemblies at the Rotunda nothing for 

 the ladies of Dublin to establish a Sunday-school in Peru nothing to 

 send and receive ambassadors to and from the antipodes like mighty 

 potentates nothing to hear the sublime and mystic oratory, the heavenly 

 doctrines, and, above all, the affecting stories of the modern apostles of 

 the Gentiles ? What would become of our sweet enthusiasts were these 

 things to cease ? How dull and comfortless would spring arrive, unat- 

 tended by Rotunda meetings how insufferable the tea-table without a 

 Missionary ! Spring might better come without her swallow and 

 her zephyr the tea-table might better want gunpowder or souchong. 

 Novelty, moreover, is of vital consequence to the religious world. 

 Who so well as the Missionary prevents zeal from waxing cold, 

 and devotion from sinking into apathy ? The comet of the saintly 

 system, by his periodical visitations, communicates new light, fervency, 

 and vigour to the centre round which he moves ! 



The " finale" of a meeting remains to be described. No sooner is the 



