376 THE BLOOMSliURY CHRIST KNING. 



godfather," said Mr. Kitterbell, as he sat in conversation with his 

 respected relative one morning. 



" I cannot, indeed I cannot," returned Dumps. 



" Well, but why not ? Jemima will think it very unkind. It's 

 very little trouble." 



" As to the trouble/' rejoined the most unhappy man in existence, 

 " I don't mind that ; but my nerves are in that state I cannot go 

 through the ceremony. You know I don't like going out. For God's 

 sake, Charles, don't fidget with that stool so, you'll drive me mad." 

 Mr. Kitterbell, quite regardless of his uncle's nerves, had occupied 

 himself for some ten minutes in describing a circle on the floor with 

 one leg of the office-stool on which he was seated, keeping the other 

 three up in the air and holding fast on by the desk. 



" I beg your pardon, uncle," said Kitterbell, quite abashed, sud- 

 denly releasing his hold of the desk, and bringing the three wander- 

 ing legs back to the floor with a force sufficient to drive them 

 throught it. 



" But come, don't refuse. If it's a boy, you know, we must have 

 two godfathers." 



" /Tit's a boy !" said Dumps, " why can't you say at once whether 

 it is a boy or not ?" 



" I should be very happy to tell you, but it's impossible I can 

 undertake to say whether it's a girl or a boy if the child isn't born 

 yet." 



" Not born yet !" echoed Dumps, with a gleam of hope lighting 

 up his lugubrious visage ; " oh, well, it may be a girl, and then you 

 won't want me, or if it is a boy, it may die before it's christened." 



" I hope not," said the father that expected to be, looking very 

 grave. 



" I hope not," acquiesced Dumps, evidently pleased with the sub- 

 ject. He was beginning to get happy. " 7 hope not, but distressing 

 cases frequently occur during the first two or three days of a child's 

 life ; fits I am told are exceedingly common, and alarming convul- 

 sions are almost matters of course." 



" Lord, uncle !" ejaculated little Kitterbell, gasping for breath. 



" Yes ; my landlady was confined let me see last Tuesday : an 

 uncommonly fine boy. On the Thursday night the nurse was sitting 

 with him upon her knee before the fire, and he was as well as pos- 

 sible. Suddenly he became black in the face, and alarmingly spas- 

 modic. The medical man was instantly sent for, and every remedy 

 was tried, but " 



" How frightful !" interrupted the horror-stricken Kitterbell. 



" The child died of course. However your child may not die, and 

 if it should be a boy, and should live to be christened, why I sup- 

 pose I must be one of the sponsors." Dumps was evidently good- 

 natured on the faith of his anticipations. 



" Thank you, uncle," said his agitated nephew, grasping his 

 hand as warmly as if he had done him some essential service. " Per- 

 haps I had better not tell Mrs. K. what you have mentioned." 



" Why, if she's low spirited, perhaps you had better not mention 

 the melancholy case to her," returned Dumps, who of course had 



