THE BLOOMSBURY CHRISTENING. 379 



round the waist, and thrusting him into the middle of his vehicle, 

 which had just come up, and only wanted the sixteenth inside. 



te All right/' said the (( Admiral," and off the thing thundered, like 

 a fire-engine at full gallop, with the kidnapped customer inside, 

 standing in the position of a half doubled up boot-jack, and falling 

 about with every jerk of ths machine, first on one side and then on 

 the other, like a " Jack in the green," on May-day, " setting" to the 

 lady with the brass ladle. 



" For God's sake, where am I to sit?" inquired the miserable man 

 of an old gentleman, into whose stomach he had just fallen for the 

 fourth time. 



"Anywhere but on my chest, sir," replied the old gentleman, in a 

 surly tone. 



" Perhaps the box would suit the gentleman better," suggested a 

 very damp lawyer's clerk, in a pink shirt and a smirking countenance. 



After a great deal of struggling and falling about, Dumps at last 

 managed to squeeze himself into a seat, which, in addition to the 

 slight disadvantage of being between a window that wouldn't shut, 

 and a door that must be open, placed him in close contact with a pas- 

 senger, who had been walking about all the morning without an 

 umbrella, and who looked as if he had spent the day in a full water- 

 butt only wetter. 



" Don't bang the door so," said Dumps to the conductor, as he 

 shut it after letting out four of the passengers ; " I am very nervous 

 it destroys me." 



" Did any gen'lm'n say any think ?" replied the cad, thrusting in 

 his head, and trying to look as if he didn't understand the request. 



" I told you not to bang the door so," repeated Dumps, with an 

 expression of countenance, like the knave of clubs in convulsions. 



" Oh ! vy its rayther a sing'ler circumstance about this here door, 

 sir, that it von't shut without banging," replied the conductor, and 

 he opened the door very wide, and shut it again with a terrific bang, 

 in proof of the assertion. 



" I beg your pardon, sir," said a little prim wheezing old gentle- 

 man, sitting opposite Dumps, " I beg your pardon ; but have you ever 

 observed, when you have been in an omnibus on a wet day, that four 

 people out of five, always come in with large cotton umbrellas, with- 

 out a handle at the top, or the brass spike at the bottom ?" 



ee Why, sir," returned Dumps, as he heard the clock strike twelve, 



" it never struck me before; but now you mention it, I Hollo! 



hollo !" shouted the persecuted individual, as the omnibus dashed 

 past Drury-lane, where he had directed to be set down. " Where is 

 the cad ?" 



" I think he's on the box, sir," said the young gentleman before 

 noticed in the pink shirt, which looked like a white one ruled with 

 red ink. 



" I want to be set down !" said Dumps, in a faint voice, overcome 

 by his previous efforts. 



" I think these cads want to be set down" returned the attorney's 

 clerk, chuckling at his sally. 



" Hollo !" cried Dumps again. 



