The Baron Court of Little Brought-in. 363 



scandal in their scolding whatever words they may use. They are 

 just such men as can be picked up about the farms and the hamlets, 

 and the proscription hovels upon the commons; and some of them 

 are from the church towns, and these are strongly suspected of being 

 " resurrection-men," because they are always speaking about " an- 

 cestors." It would not be easy, neither would it perhaps be civil in 

 all cases, to scrutinize too closely the means by which the members 

 of this court are selected, and perhaps the most charitable con- 

 struction is that the persons sent there are those who are of the least 

 use at home; this being what is called "the principle of political 

 economy" in Little Brought-in. 



If these parties were at home in the manors, one forking dung, a 

 second scouring a hedge, a third grubbing up thistles, and a fourth 

 looking after the pigs, they would be all plain Jack, and Tom, and 

 Bill, and Harry ; but it is astonishing what names the fellows assume, 

 and how they strut and show their legs, when once they come to the 

 Baron Court. They are all mere clod-hoppers, with only half as 

 many hands as an ape or legs as a donkey ; and yet they call them- 

 selves knights, and lords, and dukes, and give themselves such fan- 

 tastic airs of importance, that if all the world were to see and hear 

 them, all the world would be perfectly astonished. Even if the " rat- 

 catcher" were to get in there and it is said that his services are often 

 much wanted, he would huff and look big, and threaten you with the 

 vengeance of the Baron Court if you did not call him "the honour- 

 able gentleman" and say " Yes, Sir," " No, Sir,*' at every word, just 

 as though you were a lacquey speaking to " a person of quality." 



The Baron is, generally speaking, a very good easy sort of man, and 

 never needs take the trouble of breeding either pigs or poultry, un- 

 less for his private amusement. In consequence of his overlooking 

 those little unintentional blunders which the members of the court 

 will occasionally commit, they are careful to keep him in a warm 

 kitchen, a good joint on the table, and a tankard of as capital stingo 

 as all the three manors can afford. His saucepans too are all kept nice 

 and clean, and his cooks and scullions have aprons as white as the 

 driven snow. The Baron's Lady is dressed up like any duchess, and 

 never puts her hand to an article except she takes a fancy to it. When 

 there is an increase of the baron's family there is great rejoicing, and 

 ringing of bells, and blowing of horns, and firing of squibs ; and the 

 court order a handsome caudle-cup and cover for the lady, and a 

 pap-boat, cradle, and blanket for the young baron, together with a 

 soft nightcap for the baron himself, in order that he may enjoy his 

 rest after his labour. In short, there is no landlord more beloved or 

 better served by his tenants than the baron of Little Brought-in, and 

 there are few that deserve it half as much. His kitchen is known all 

 the world over for the vast quantity of broken meat which is distri- 

 buted to the poor, especially to those who have seen better days or 

 who are longing to see them. It would do the heart of any Chris- 

 tian man, or woman either, good, to see such sights of beggars as 

 crowd about the baron's kitchen, each with a dish bigger than another, 

 and none of them sent empty away. In they go, men, women, and 

 children, wearing all sorts of dresses, and speaking all sorts of Ian- 



