428 The Club Room. [APRIL, 



a civil answer from Melville. But is the story true, that Ellenborough 

 goes to the Admiralty ? 



Shilelah. No. He goes at present only to Doctors' Commons. Though, 

 since Danceing Schwartzbergen has relieved him of all domestic 

 concerns, he has the more leisure on his hands ; and, I suppose, he 

 would make quite as good a First Lord of the Admiralty, as he makes 

 a President of the Board of Controul, and that he would make as good 

 a Commander-in-chief, as either. 



Sheep. But, how the deuce did they let him off for the Elephant let- 

 ter ? I am certain that it was his writing. 



Megrim. Unquestionably. For no man in existence but himself 

 could have written it. But the sentiment came from a higher quar- 

 ter. The controul of a judge is not an unpalatable topic, even though 

 the secret may be blustered out by a booby. And you may rely upon 

 the maxim, that, if colonies and conquests are good for any thing, 

 they are good for experiments of this kind. I knew that Ellenborough 

 would not be sent to Coventry to correct his law or his language ; I 

 knew that he would be defended ; and I knew, also, that what the whole 

 tribe of geese, on one side, thought a glorious opportunity for ruffling 

 their feathers and cackling about, would be only a new ground for 

 favour to the man of curls and carmine. 



Rakeley (tossing away a newspaper). The thing is among the most 

 superlative instances of human blindness. However, one should re- 

 member that Harley-street, No. 73, is at the Antipodes ; that the talk 

 of the servants' hall never reaches the drawing-room ; that the eternal 

 chatter of every club-room, conversazione, concert, and dinner-table, by 

 some luck, hereafter to be explained, necessarily steers clear of the only 

 man who has a right to hear, see, and understand, the matter. Have 

 you read Adams' speech on the Divorce Bill before the lords ? 



Megrim. Yes ; and a very good speech it is. But what is the won- 

 der ? Her ladyship's love was going on only a twelvemonth. In the 

 face of day, and in the heart of London ; within half a dozen doors of 

 her honoured papa's house ; between the hours of twelve and three ; 

 her pha?ton and grooms in waiting ; all the footmen in the street expect- 

 ing her ladyship's arrival as regularly as the postman's ; Schwartzenberg 

 himself, in full costume, leaning out of his window to give the fair one 

 the due diplomatic reception. Yet the affair never transpired, from 

 May, 1828, until March, 1829. Nothing could be more perverse. But 

 you know the principal, on those occasions, is always presumed to be the 

 last acquainted with his misfortune. 



Saveall. What damages does he get ? Something handsome, I take 

 it for granted, to reconcile him to the loss of so valuable a wife. 



Sir Robert. Oh, sorrow is too fatal to the complexion, for him to 

 suffer it to sit upon his brow. Schwartzenberg is a foreign prince, and, 

 on the double title, exempt from every thing but a horsewhip : he 

 having, as a foreigner, no possession beyond his moustaches and his 

 laced coat ; and, as prince, entitled to the privilege belonging to the 

 rank in all countries, of paying nothing. 



Friezland, to Sir Ronald. Napier's book I have just finished the 

 second volume, notes and all. It appears to me one of the most pro- 

 mising performances of the month. His admiration of every thing 

 French is quite in my style of thinking. The discovery that every 

 thing we did was wrong, though we succeeded, and every thing the 

 French did was right, though it failed ; that the French troops were 



