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F E E D I N G T 1 M E. 



People who are uxorioiisly affected, and young gentlemen deeply 

 in love, may say what they please about comfortable fire-sides 

 and secluded groves ; a seat at a public dinner table is the most 

 comfortable spot in existence. You may be seated by the side 

 of a journeyman pig killer, who demolishes two chickens, bones 

 and all, with the best part of a ham, in less than ten minutes : — 

 but what of that ? You also may eat enough to serve you for a 

 fortnight to come, there is no restriction ; legs of mutton are as 

 plentiful as blackberries, and the fragrance of roast beef arises on 

 all sides. You may be placed opposite a forge bronzed black- 

 smith, who tucks up his sleeves that he may the more conveni- 

 ently denude the rib of an ox, wolf like, with his grinders; and 

 afterwards pokes the gristly fragments from between his tusks 

 with a fork : — this is no business of yours, mind your own plate. 

 You may be in juxta position with a purse-proud candle maker, 

 who takes every possible care to intimate that you have intruded 

 between the wind and his nobility — upsets your glass — thrusts 

 his elbow into your eye — and looks as if he expected you to beg 

 his pardon . Never mind , it 's a trial of your philosophy, apologize 

 to him, and recollect that, when a school boy, you often wrote 

 as a round hand copy — *' Patience is a virtue.'' 



Englishmen, like the wild beasts in the Zoological Society's 

 collection, are exhibited to most advantage at feeding time. That 

 unity of purpose which renders Britons invincible at sea and 

 unconquerable on land may be observed in their gastronomic 

 operations; harmoniously carnivorous and socially bibulous they 

 go to work with an intenseness of energy which is highly poetic. 

 Their elongated and bluish countenances, if the viands are 

 delayed beyond the appointed time, show how unanimously are 

 they eager for the fray ; and their disinclination to wait for any 

 such prelude as saying grace evinces that it is no joke, but really 

 and truly war to the knife : gash after gash must be made into 

 flesh of some denomination — a boiled elephant would be famous 

 eating, at such times, if one may judge from the tenderness and 

 succulency of a slice from the under side of the lumbar vertebrof. 



The more mixed the operators at a public dinner are, the more 

 glorious will be the fun thereat : if ever variety be charming it is 

 surely in such a case. Philosophers, who would study mankind 

 unsophisticated by sobriety, should be regular attendants at 

 public dinners : when the grog is well in, most of the wit may 



