TOM HYNES. 187 



as to require the aid of double irons to tranquillize him. He was 

 in consequence sent to the Naval Plospital, and thence to the 

 Hoxton Madhouse, London, where he remained under medical 

 treatment for six weeks ; and was then sent to Chatham for chano^e 

 of air, and to join the division of marines stationed at that place. 

 From Chatham he was marched to his old quarters in Stonehouse, 

 and subsequently he was sent on board the Windsor Castle, then 

 lying in Hamoaze. Poor Tom exhibited so many marks of 

 flightiness, and committed so many vagaries, during his next 

 cruise, that, as soon as the ship reached shore, he was discharged 

 mad! 



Tom bears no particular affection to the Lords of the Admiralty, 

 for not granting him a pension : he considers himself as much 

 entitled to one, on the score of the wound which he received by 

 shipwreck, as he would have been, had he lost a limb in action. 

 For a time Tom was completely on his beam ends ; at length 

 he plucked up his courage, and visited the home of his fathers. 

 On arriving at Rattery, he found all the admirers of his not yet 

 obliterated charms, comfortably married ; and, though they might 

 have something to do in the way of chronicling small beer, it is 

 quite certain that they did not suckle fools; their numerous 

 offspring being shrewd, sharp-witted, and plump. 



Tom lived at Rattery and other places as an agricultural 

 labourer for ten years; at the end of which period he set out for 

 Plymouth, on a matrimonial speculation; for he found that 

 bachelor's blessedness did not exactly suit his constitution. 

 After many hair breadth escapes in this expedition, he at length 

 met with a damsel after his own heart ; who by a singular coin- 

 cidence was casting about for a husband, as earnestly as Tom 

 was for a wife: during two long weeks the happy pair spoke 

 many soft words to each other, according to the wont of lovers. 

 On the first day of the third week, they were united in the bonds 

 of matrimony. 



Tom being a prudent man, and a good natured fellow withal, 

 (except on such occasions as he puts an enemy into his mouth, 

 to steal away his brains, or as he himself says, gets swipey) very 

 wisely considered that he ought to provide himself with the ways 

 and means to support any family which might result from his 

 marriage: he scraped an acquaintance with divers bricklayers, 

 who with much kindness of heart appointed him as their secretary; 

 the duties of his office being to sift lime, make mortar, and carry 

 bricks to whatever elevation might be needed. Lime dust, how- 

 ever, proved hurtful to Tom's eyes — so he tendered the resigna- 

 tion of his secretaryship, which the bricklayers were most 

 graciously pleased to accept. 



Tom's next step was to enlist in that heroic and honorable 

 corps the old Plymouth Watch. His courage being always of an 

 indomitable kind, many and many a drunken and disorderly nigiit- 

 brawler was by its means conveyed to the watch house ; and Tom 



