BACHELORS' BLESSEDNESS. Ill 



the latter is as much entitled to the polite pronomen of 

 "audacious scribbler" as the former. 



It is very possible that the " honorable bachelors in 

 the kingdom" would mend their steps to get out of a 

 shower of rain (I should not, though, if the fish rose 

 well) that they would lift their hats to the young la- 

 dies (I would) and that they would talk perfectly 

 demurely and sedately to their washerwomen or cham- 

 bermaids (I might;) these three postulates I will 

 grant to the " blessed" bachelor : in return I do not 

 perceive how he can, conscientiously, expect us to swal- 

 low his assertions touching the general fate of married 

 men, except it be cum grano salis. It may chance 

 that bricklayers secretaries, journeymen shoemakers, 

 coal heavers, Welch curates &c. do get frequent " blow- 

 ings up" from their better halves, have to " rock the 

 cradle" peel the onions and undergo many similar " de- 

 lights ;" but surely if we are to consider these matters 

 as arguments against matrimony, we may just as well 

 enter our protest against wearing coats, because we 

 have occasionally noticed one of the illagent pisanthry 

 of the sister isle, arrayed in a garment displaying forty 

 or fifty patches, and twice that number of breaches. 



I have lately been sojourning in a wild and unculti- 

 vated district, and, in my rural rambles, have frequently 

 visited the home of the poor man ; I must admit that, 

 in two instances, the benedicts seldom returned to their 

 dwellings without finding the " brats" ready to squall, 

 and the wife prepared to scold ; as well as to use the 

 " drumsticks" with uncommon vigour ; but I must also 

 confess that these wights had an amazing predilection 

 for distilled waters, and seldom considered it needful 

 that any portion of their earnings should be appropria- 

 ted to the purchase of food and clothing for their fa- 

 milies. 



However, in most instances that have fallen under 

 my cognizance, it always seemed that the poor man 

 did return with gladness to his home, where he met 

 with a kind welcome from his wife, and greetings of 

 gladness from his children poverty had not blunted 



