136 BACHELORS' BLESSEDNESS. 



all this I am sure he will richly deserve. But should 

 his "young damsel of gentle blood/' bestow upon him 

 a " sound rating," let him remember (for his lady will) 

 that he has now pledged himself to bear all this quietly, 

 and to " class " such " ratings " " among the bless- 

 ings of matrimony. " Never may he have reason to 

 lament the want of such " blessings " ! ! 



If Theobald will take the trouble to refer to my 

 former paper, he will find that / did not furnish the 

 " sanctum " with a " carpet. " This, however, he has 

 kindly supplied, for the purpose of " deluging it with 

 water, " by way of showing that I do not understand 

 the English mode of house cleaning. Perhaps I need 

 not tell him that it is not " every honourable bachelor in 

 the kingdom " who is so " blessed " as to have a "carpet " 

 on the floor of his " sanctum ; " but even in most houses 

 in which there are carpets (except, perhaps, in Theo- 

 bald's) I suppose they are sometimes removed in order 

 that the " floor " may be " cleansed " if not " deluged " 

 " with water. " 



What a happy knack friend Theobald has of drawing 

 inferences to suit his own purpose. From my merely 

 asking whether the " author" to whom I referred had 

 never heard of " squalling brats" not a very uncom- 

 mon epithet, I believe your fishing friend has inferred 

 that I have an " antipathy to children." On the autho- 

 rity of a Phrenologist, in addition to my own, I assure 

 him that this is not the case. Some time ago, a friend, 

 who had long studied the science of bumps, examined 

 those which my pericranium presented ; and, if I mis- 

 take not, he told me that I had one which indicated 

 love to children. I can, only say that if there be not 

 such a bump on the exterior, the " propensity " is 

 certainly within. 



I cannot throw down my pen without thanking The- 

 obald for his very good advice. I am almost disposed 

 to give him a little'in return, but will leave this for his 

 " young damsel of gentle blood." He will no doubt be 

 more ready to attend to her advice than mine, especially 

 if followed up by "a sound rating.'' 



