THE ANTNUAL MEETING. 177 



REPORT OF THE APPLE COMMITTEE. 



To the Officers and Memlers of tlie Micliigan State Pomological Society: 



The Oomnnttee on Apples, at the Ilorticultural Exhibition connected with 

 the State Fair at Detroit, were instructed to supplement their report with ^'re- 

 marks." Doubtless you did not reflect on your liabilities, but you can't com- 

 plain if we scrupulously confine ourselves to what, with a liberal interpretation, 

 mav be ranched under the head of 



EEMARKS. 



We judged the apples — the exhibitors and the public judged ns. We doji'fc 

 appeal from the jurisdiction, or hope to escape sentence, we merely plead miti- 

 gating circumstances. We took considerable pains (after our appointment), 

 to keep ourselves from getting demoralized — avoided conversation with our 

 Avives on their return from the sewing society; didn't mingle much in church 

 quarrels; abstained from horse-trades and sleight-of-hand in packing apples; 

 didn't make much of a run for office, and scarcely talked politics, except to 

 tell a weak brother, who was evidently going over to civil service reform, that 

 lie musn't do it, unless the democrats should get control of the custom house 

 gang. 



After undergoing a sort of quarantine we entered upon our duties, resolved 

 to be discriminating and just or die in the attempt, — we didn't die, but we were 

 bothered. You see how it was : here was an apple with a worm in it, there wa? 

 an apple with another kind of worm, excellent of their kind, which was best 

 was a matter of taste, and tastes are somewhat allowed to differ — but we had 

 to bring in a verdict, and the fellow who didn't win was mad of course. Take 

 another case — here are several plates of Pennocks, a large brilliant red apple, 

 delightful to look at, but just about as worthless as a handsome bejeweled miss 

 who don't know how to do plain cooking. A sensible, conscientious critic, on 

 the principal ''of two evils choose the least," will put both hands on his heart 

 and give all the premiums to the very smallest Pennocks, but it will make a 

 row and the public will side with the big Pennocks. Take still another case : 

 Here are several exhibits ''as near alike as two peas," no body but the owners 

 can see any difference ; and still another, where each have special merits offset 

 by special demerits — the more the committee cogitate the doubtfuller they get, 

 and when in very desperation they bring in their verdict it is plain to outsiders 

 that they were bribed, and would gladly have perjured themselves if they could 

 have got themselves sworn. 



Committees, in all their tribulations, can depend on the moral support of the 

 first premium fellows ; they stand by us, right or wrong, through thick and thin. 

 They know our decisions are right and were honestly rendered. There isn't 

 the shadow of a reason why they should have been different. Second premium 

 chaps are apt to be a little mad at first, but they rather defend us after con- 

 sidering how much better off they are than the rest of mankind. 



Of course it would put us ahead some to give the premiums to those who can 

 make the most noise, but the caterwauling capacities of men are not easily 

 estimated ; after being " as wise as serpents," we are "as defenseless as doves." 

 The trouble comes from the multitude of exhibitors; we make ten mad where 

 one is pleased — just as Governors and Congressmen do when they distribute the 

 offices — so you see the chances are against us from the very start, and the best 



