THE NEW YORK JOURNAL OF PHARMACY 



27 



The plot thickens: The air of the 

 wedding strain is old to "Artie" Bur- 

 nett ; we also learn other heirs (airs) 

 are old; will wonders never cease? 

 All "Art" does is blush. Co-eds, 

 please note ! For full information 

 write Miss Cairax, Matrimonial 

 Bureau. N. Y. J. P. 



EXCHANGES. 



"The baby ate some worsted, 



Don't worry; said his pater 

 He'll likely swallow all the yarns 

 He hears a little later." 



— Cornell Widow. 

 J- 

 And They Get Away With It. 

 It was in the conservatory. 

 "Won't you let me hug you," he 

 murmured ardently. 



"Not here," she replied. "It wouldn't 

 be proper." 



Going out on the dance floor they 

 engaged in a clinch and tangoed under 

 the scrutiny of staid chaperones. 



— Jack-O'-Lanterii. 



Luther. — Yes. I live in Brooklyn, 

 now. 



Lois. — Is it possible? 

 Luther. — Oh, sure ; some of the in- 

 habitants have done it for years. 



— Widow. 

 J. 

 Fashion Hint. 

 SUGGESTION is nine points of 

 the Raw, 



— Dartmouth Jack-O. 



Naughty. 

 Percy. — Heavens ! I got a zero to- 

 day. 



Swart. — That's nothing. 



— Purple Cow. 



HIS IDEA OF HEAVEN . 



The druggist approached the Ce- 

 lestial gate. St. Peter opened the 

 portal for him and bade him enter and 

 join the heavenly choir. 



"Not so fast," admonished the com- 

 l)Ounder of pills. "Before I go in 

 there I want to ask a few questions. 

 Have you any city directories in Para- 

 dise?"' 



"No," replied St. Peter. 



"Any remedies for growing hair on 

 bald heads and door knobs?" 



"None." 



"Any soda fountains?" 



"We don't know what they are." 



"Do you sell stamps?" 



"We don't use them here." 



"And last but not least, have you 

 any telephones?" 



"We have not" 



"Then I'll go in, for I guess this is 

 1 leaven all right, all right." 



FEMININE PHARMACY. 



There in the corner pharmacy. 

 This lithesome lady lingers, 



And patent pills and philters true 

 Are fashioned by her fingers. 



Her phiz behind the soda fount 

 Is often seen in summer. 



How sweetly foams the soda fiz 

 When you receive it from her. 



When mixing belladonna drops 

 With tincture of lobelia, 



And putting up prescriptions 

 She's fairer than Ophelia. 



Each poison in its proper place, 

 Each potion is her chalice, 



Tier daedel fingers are so deft 

 They call her digitalis. 



