Missouri Home Makers' Conference. 603 



child. Her nervous habits are no more under her control than 

 is her heartbeat or her digestion. 



Accompanying this nervousness is a distaste for continuous 

 work. It is nearly impossible to get her to put away her toys 

 unless interest is kept up by some kind of game. If she spills 

 a box of buttons it becomes the task of an afternoon to compel 

 her to pick them up as a punishment for carelessness. 



Training such a child as this is a delicate and complicated 

 matter, for in this case the connection between the physical 

 nature and the mental and moral nature is easily seen, and there- 

 fore the parent becomes more gentle in dealing with moral 

 defects. What might seem to be a moral defect is often only 

 a nervous disorder. The training being given to this child is 

 largely physical. Nervousness can be partly controlled after 

 the body has been well built up. But it is a matter of years' 

 work. 



Other children are naturally obedient — that is, they easily 

 do what they are told to do. They do not keep particularly 

 busy about their own play, nor too busy to pay attention to 

 other things. 



One must not make a little tin god of obedience. While 

 obedient children are convenient and may save serious diffi- 

 culties, implicit obedience is a bad sign of sturdy character, 

 and parents who demand utter, unreasoned obedience are killing 

 their children's character and later chance for independent 

 action. 



There are several ways of training in obedience. One is the 

 immediate, severe punishment of every form of disobedience. 

 It is a common belief that if every tendency toward disobedience 

 is punished the child will of course be obedient. But obedience 

 must be of the heart. Children who are thwarted will become 

 deceitful if they have any grit and personality at all. They 

 must have their own way some of the time; and the parent, in 

 getting the appearance of obedience, is losing many things 

 even more valuable than obedience. 



There is also the theory of reasoning with children. Obe- 

 dience is secured by giving reasons for it. But parents soon 

 learn to their sorrow that children are irrational little brutes. 

 They love to argue and question and procrastinate, but they 

 are not at all interested in the real reasons for and against their 

 desires. They are interested in gaining some end by fair means 

 or foul. And the parents who are careful to explain and to 



