298 



The Weekly Florists' Review. 



August 8, 1901. 



POTTING SHED IDYLS. 



A TEMPERANCE LESSON. 



The "old man" did not believe in car- 

 rying rose beds over, and each year, at 

 the season when greenhouse work pro- 

 duces a thirst that would stock a herd 

 of camels, the men spent long, broiling 

 days in rushing soil in and out in hand 

 barrows, mending and whitewashing 

 benches, and similar restful occupations. 

 Jaggs had thoughtfully developed a 

 sprained ankle a few days before plant- 

 ifig began, which unfitted him for the 

 more strenuous part of the work; conse- 

 quently he sat on a peat barrel doing a 

 bit of potting, while the others hiked in 

 soil. 



"Seems to me Jaggs will be overwork- 

 in' hisself if he don't look out," ob- 

 served Tommy, strolling back from a 

 swim in the creek after supper. "Him 

 and that bloomin' old parrot o' the old 

 lady's is alike — they both takes most 

 o' their exercise in talkin'." 



"I reckon I generally remind you o' 

 something moral and improvin', don't I, 

 Tommy?" remarked Jaggs, genially. 



"You do," responded Tommy. "Fact 

 is. Jaggs, I never see you without think- 

 in' o' the ten commandments." 



"Yes?" queried Jaggs, languidly. 



"Sure thing," said Tommy. "You're 

 both of you generally broke." 



Jaggs acknowledged the compliment 

 by firing a lump of peat at Tommy, and 

 then subsided on the lily crate which 

 formed part of the furniture of the sum- 

 mer garden. There was a brief flurry, 

 caused by Tommy falling off a barrel in 

 the effort to escape a daddy-long-legs 

 which tried to find refuge down the back 

 of his neck. 



"Don't be cruel to poor dumb hin- 

 secks, Tommy," observed Jaggs, reprov- 

 ingly. "I've known lots o' them as was 

 more improvin' society than some men." 



"I believe yer," said Tommy, unpleas- 

 antly. "They can't talk." 



"I knowed a batch o' cockroaches 

 once," continued Jaggs, "as persuaded a 

 man to quit drinkin' ; he went and 

 joined the Salvation Army afterwards, 

 but o' course 'tain't fair to blame the 

 roaches for that." 



"Was they actual hinsecks," asked 

 Tommy, "or did you just see 'em?" 



Jaggs ignored this, and paused to 

 start his pipe afresh before continuing 

 his narrative. "I vras down at the 

 Squeebosset Nurseries," he observed, 

 "bloomin' old pen, where they handles 

 a lot o' tropical stuff. 'Course they gets 

 everythink goin' in the hinseck line. 

 Once we gets a special importation o' 

 tree leeches in a batch o' ferns, as keeps 

 the chaps on the run most o' the time — 

 big fellows, with a smile on 'em like 

 'ammer-'eaded sharks. I reckon as the 

 boss would a-gone out o' business if it 

 'adn't been for a green boa as dropped in 

 with a batch o' Philippine orchids — and 

 the boss didn't pay no had vollerum 

 on him, neither. I reckon them graspin' 

 custom house chaps put him on the free 

 list. Anyway, he gets away with the 

 leeches, and the rats, and a pair or two 

 o' rubber boots, and I reckon he'd been 

 livin' yet if he 'adn't run across a Sun- 

 day paper. It 'ad a special full-page 



article about money in Dutch bulbs, 

 with a lot o' pipe-dream pictures, and 

 even a boa constrictor couldn't svvaller 

 that! He just curled up his toes 

 peaceful like, and went and died back o' 

 the boilers." 



There was a brief pause. Tommy 

 Atkins' terrier Patches rushed in, seek- 

 ing sympathy for a bald spot over one 

 eye, which suggested a difference of 

 opinion with Pharaoh, the greenhouse 

 cat. Pharaoh strolled in after him, 

 purring melodiously, but giving Patches 

 a wide berth; then settled down to sleep 

 on Davy's solid knee. 



"But what about them moral and 

 improvin' roaches, Jaggs, old boy ?" 

 asked Tommy. 



"Well, as I was sayin'," continued 

 Jaggs, "it was a bloomin' old jail of a 

 place, and when I was on duty nights I 

 used to get lonesome enough to join the 

 W. C. T. U., or do hanythiuk else des- 

 perate. There wasn't no society, and 

 exceptin' the boss and me, there wasn't 

 a chap on the place as could talk what 

 you might call good English. But cock- 

 roaches — Lor' — that was afore that 

 bloomin' snake joined us — there was a 

 reg'lar procession of 'em everywhere. 

 They wasn't natives either, but them 

 big tropical ones. I wouldn't like to 

 say as any of 'em was over six inches 

 long, but it was a reg'lar thing to see 

 the boss's terrier shake one of 'em by 

 the scruff o' the neck, thinkin' it was a 

 rat! They was intelligent, too — there 

 was one old chap as we tamed^ — he was 

 pertic'ler fond o' fried potatoes — and 

 when I was waterin' at one end o' the 

 range, and wanted to send a message up 

 to the pottin' shed, I'd just tie a note 

 around his neck, and he'd trot off mth it 

 as pleased as Punch." 



"Say, Jaggs," inquired Tommy anx- 

 iously, "was you talkin' about the ter- 

 rier or the cockroach?" 



"Used to worry me some," continued 

 Jaggs, ignoring the interruption, "when 

 I was on duty alone nights. A chap can 

 have too much of most hanythink — 

 specially roaches. There was one night 

 the tame ones kep' 'angin' round till 

 they was a reg'lar nuisance, and I got 

 tired of 'em. There was a lot o' scraps o' 

 crape paper layin' round — the boss had 

 been trimmin' up a lot o' plants for a 

 church tea fight. I picked up one o' the 

 snips, cut out a pair o' purple wings, and 

 clapped 'em on to the big fellow with a 

 dab o' paste. Well, you never see a hin- 

 seck more pleased; he ambled off, look- 

 in' like he was givin' the others a treat. 

 I liked his looks myself, so I kept on 

 decoratin', and pretty soon I had the 

 giddiest panorama you ever see — some 

 of 'em would make a rainbow look like 

 widder's weeds. Talk about birds o' 

 Paradise — they wasn't in it — them 

 hinsecks was more variegated than the 

 novelties in a spring catalogue. 



"Well, I just sits there, admirin' 'em, 

 when Jimmy Oakley strolled in. Re- 

 member him, Davy?" 



"A vera demoralising auld man," said 

 Davy, severely. 



"■Yes," observed Tommy, "he's been 

 goin' 'ome for twenty year — wouldn't 

 stay another night in this bloomin' coun- 



try if it wasn't such a long damp walk 

 back to Liverpool." 



"Well," continued Jaggs, "you know 

 he wasn't never what you might call a 

 white ribbon chap, and that evenin' I 

 reckon he wouldn't 'a been surprised if 

 he'd seen a pink elephant helpin' a pea- 

 green hippopotamus to pot off orchids. 

 He says: 



" 'Ullo, Jaggs,' and sits down. I says : 



" 'Ullo, Jimmy,' and keeps on smokin'. 

 I see he keep lookin' at them hinsecks; 

 they was paradin' around, like a politi- 

 cal procession — I reckon there was 

 'undreds of 'em. By and by he says, very 

 precise-like: 'Seems to me them cock- 

 roaches is a bit different from ordinary.' 

 'Maybe a bit bigger,' says I; 'they ain't 

 natives, most of 'em bein' Brazilian.' 

 'Well,' says he, 'I never see even a Bra- 

 zilian roach with pea-green wings afore 

 — must be a hybrid.' "Jimmy,' says I, 

 'seems to me your boots must be a pre- 

 cious sight brighter than yer head; 

 roaches ain't never nothink but a decent 

 respectable brown. When a chap begins 

 to see sky-blue-scarlet cockroaches 

 with butterfly wings,' I says, 'he ought 

 to think seriously where he's a-driftin' 

 to,' I says. 



" 'Do you mean to say,' says he, look- 

 in' at a chap with double purple and yel- 

 low wings as was erawlin' over a pile 

 o' thumb pots, 'as there ain't nothink 

 here but plain everyday cockroaches?' 



" 'I do mean just that,' says I, 'and 

 you'd ought to turn over a new leaf 

 afore you begin to see sky-blue centi- 

 pedes playin' seven-up with a drove of 

 horned toads,' says I. 'A man as sees 

 unoffending hinsecks as looks like they 

 was dropped out of a kaleidoscope,' says 

 I, 'must have samethink serious the mat- 

 ter with him.' 



" 'Jaggs,' says he, very solemn and 

 dignified, 'your opinions is always worth 

 listenin'to. Possibly I've been eatin' 

 somethink as disagreed with me,' says 

 he, lookin' at another of them iridescent 

 hinsecks. 'It makes me quite fanciful. I 

 think I'd better get some sleep.' So the 

 old chap started off, and I did hear as 

 bne o' them missions got hold of him 

 since; he's goin' around holdin' forth as 

 a reformed florist — first on record. But 

 if the old chap has reformed, them var- 

 iegated hinsecks jolly well deserve the 

 credit of it." 



"Say, Jaggs," said Tommy, "do you 

 know why your true stories about ani- 

 mals always reminds me o' the Pali- 

 sades?" 



Jaggs, who was knocking out his pipe, 

 made" no response, and the unabashed 

 Tommy called back, as he made his es- 



"Both of 'em, you see, is mighty big 

 bluffs!" 



jANESVnxE, Wis.— Mr. and Mrs. 

 George Eentschler sailed for Germany on 

 the 20th ult. They expect to be gone 

 three or four months. 



Wichita, Kan. — S. Stough is building 

 a $1,000 addition to his greenhouse at 

 1202 Water street. 



Port Chester, N. Y'. — Rudolph 

 Lortsche, a Swiss gardener of this place, 

 has received word that his brother of 

 South Dakota has died leaving an estate 

 valued at about $50,000. Mr. Lortsche 

 will inherit the larger part of it. 



LooMis, Cal. — A. Mitting is erecting 

 two greenhouses on his 20-acre place 

 here. 



