134 NEAREST THE POLE 



on between these leads a forced march was made. 

 Then we slept a few hours, and starting again soon 

 after midnight, pushed on till a little before noon of 

 the 2ist. 



I should have liked to leave eveiything at this camp 

 and push on for the one march with one empty sledge 

 and one or two companions, but I did not dare to do 

 this owing to the condition of the ice, and was glad as 

 we advanced that I had not attempted it. I do not 

 know if any of my Eskimos would have remained 

 behind. In this last spurt we crossed fourteen cracks 

 and narrow leads, which almost without exception, 

 were in motion. 



When my observations were taken and rapidly 

 figured, they showed that we had reached 87° 6' 

 north latitude, and had at last beaten the record, 

 for which I thanked God with as good a grace as 

 possible, though I felt that the mere beating of the 

 record was but an empty bauble compared with the 

 splendid jewel on which I had set my heart for years, 

 and for which, on this expedition, I had almost literally 

 been straining my life out. 



It is perhaps an interesting illustration of the uncer- 

 tainty or complexity of human nature that my feelings 

 at this time were anything but the feelings of exul- 

 tation which it might be supposed that I should have. 

 As a matter of fact, they were just the reverse, and 

 my bitter disappointment combined perhaps with a 

 certain degree of physical exhaustion from our kill- 

 ing pace on scant rations, gave me the deepest fit of 

 the blues that I experienced during the entire expedi- 

 tion. 



