348 



THE FRUITS IN CONVENTION. 



guage in the world, — a language which 

 every educated person was bound to under- 

 stand, — a language spoken by Duhamel 

 and Van Mons, the greatest of pomolo- 

 gists, — a language more universal than the 

 English, — spoken, in short, in all civilized 

 countries, and especially spoken by fine 

 ladies, over a dish of fine pears at the des- 

 sert. {Great applause.) 



Here a stranger to us, the Bizi des Vete- 

 rans, rose and said : — Sare, I have de honor 

 to just arrive in dis country. I am very 

 much chagrinee at dis proposition to take 

 away my name. I have run away from de 

 revolutions, what take away my property, 

 and here I hope to find la liberie — la paix ; 

 and I only find les voleurs — robbers — vat 

 vish to take away my name. Yes-sare ; 

 and what they will call me den ? — " wild 

 old mans," or "old sojair?" Bah! Me 

 no like to be so, Moi, who belong to de 

 grand bataillon — le garde Napotton ! 



Here a pleasant and amiable lady rose, 

 evidently a little embarrassed. It was 

 Louise Bonne de Jersey. She said she loved 

 America. True, she had found the climate 

 not to agree with her at first, and her chil- 

 dren seemed to pine away; but since she 

 had taken that hardy creature, the Quince, 

 for a partner, they had done wonderfully 

 well. For her own part, she had no ob- 

 jection whatever to being called "Good 

 Louise," or even "Dear Louisa," if her 

 American friends and cou.-ins liked it bet- 

 ter. All she asked was to be allowed to 

 live in the closest intimacy with the Quince, 

 ' and not to have any cutting remarks made 

 at her roots. She could not bear that. 



A very superb and stately lady next rose, 

 giving a shake to her broad skirts of yellow 

 satin, and looking about her with the air of 

 a Duchess. In fact, it was the Duchesse 

 d' 'Angoultme ; and though she was a little 

 high shouldered, and her features some- 



what irregular, she had still a very noble 

 air. She remarked, in a simple and dig- 

 nified voice, that she had been many years 

 in this country, and had become very par- 

 tial to the people and institutions. Natu- 

 rally, she had strong- attachments to old 

 names and associations, especially where, 

 as in her case, they w T ere names that were 

 names. But, she added, it was impossible 

 to live in America without mixing with 

 the people ; and it was impossible to mix 

 with the people, if one's very name could 

 not be understood. It was very distressing 

 to her feelings to find, as she did, that 

 French was not taught in the common 

 schools; and she hoped if an agricultural 

 college was established, the scholars would 

 be taught that language which was synony- 

 mous with everything elegant and refined. 

 She trusted, in conclusion, that though 

 names should be anglicised, the dignity 

 would be preserved. A Duchess, in name 

 at least, she must always be ; but if repub- 

 licans preferred to call her simply the 

 Duchess of Angouleme, she saw nothing 

 amiss in it. Especially, — she remarked, 

 with a slight toss of the head, — especially, 

 since she had heard an ignorant man, at 

 the country-seat where she resided, call 

 her repeatedly " Dutchy-Dan goes-lame ;" 

 and another, who visits him, speak of her, 

 as "Dutch Dangle-um," forgetting that 

 she abhorred Holland. 



She was followed by the Red Streak Ap- 

 ple, from New-Jersey, a very blunt, sturdy 

 fellow, who spoke his mind plainly. He 

 said he liked the good sense of the lady 

 who had just spoken ; she was a woman he 

 should have no objection to call a Duchess 

 himself. About this matter he had but 

 iew words to say. Some folks were all 

 talk and no cider; that, thank God! was 

 not his fashion. What he had to say he 

 said ; and that was, that he was sick of 



