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Tales of the Trade 



THE ORIGINAL CUBIST 

 Since the ilaily papers and leading magazines nowadays are full 

 of stories of the discovery of the peculiar, alleged artistic value of 

 the work of the cubists, it may not be amiss to repeat the accom- 

 panying picture which was published in Hardwood Record some 

 months ago as showing who the original cubist artist really was. It 

 is J. V. Hamilton of Fort Scott, Kans., and his system of making 

 cubist pictures apparently is of much higher artistic value than 

 any that have been exhibited at the sundry art shows in Xew 

 York and Chicago recently. 



This particular picture is made from sections of veneers and it 

 is a composite portrait of the veneer men of the United States 

 worrying over how to catch up with current orders. Mr. Hamilton 

 is really entitled to the distinction of being 

 the Simon-pure original cubist artist of the 

 country. 



A "BILLY" DINGS STORY 

 W. W. Dings, of St. Louis, tells a story 

 on himself. It was probably not intended 

 for publication, but is too good to lose. 



Billy dropped into a chair at a swell 

 barber shop recently for a shave, and as he 

 seated himself his eye caught a glimpse of 

 a very alluring bit of femininity occupied as 

 a manicure artist at his right. Billy is not 

 adverse to glancing at the personal pulchri- 

 tude of womankind either in a barber shop 

 or out of it, and unconsciously, of course, 

 he occasionally turned his head for another 

 view. 



The barber was of foreign extraction, 

 and eventually stopped his work, and going 

 out to the middle of the room turned a cheval 

 glass so it faced Mr. Dings, and coming back 

 made the following suggestion: 



"If ze gentleman will observe, he can 

 view ze lady in ze glass, vitch vill make it 

 less possible that I cut his throat." 



Billy immediately sat up and took notice. 



DELIVERED THE GOODS 

 Some time ago a Minneapolis lumberman 

 happened to be in the oflSee of Jack Hayden, 

 secretary of the Northwestern Hardwood 

 Lumbermen 's Association and connected 

 with the Mississippi Valley Lumberman, and mentioned to Jack 

 that if the Lumberman had any spare copies of the Congressional 

 Record he would like to have them. 



A number were left at his office from time to time and iinally a 

 messenger appeared with tno huge rolls of unopened Records neatly 

 tied up with rope. Receipt of same was acknowledged to ilr. Hayden 

 by the following letter: 



Hon. Jack Hayden. 



Washington. D. C, 

 Honorable Sir : 



I'ermit lis to express our hearty appreciation of the small (avor (?) 

 extended to u.s in sending "Congressional Records" since the foundation 

 of the Government. These documents shall be given a largo place in our 

 office and in perusing same, should the writer chance to stray across the 

 path of some fool statesman, be will think of you. 



I may. in the future, have an office on the ground floor of some build- 

 ing, and should this occur, will advise you, so that all future deliveries 

 may be made by furniture van, or possibly it will be better for me to 

 secure trackage facilities. 



I should like at some time to vote for you. having the highest regard 

 for the man who "delivers the goods" and if there is an.v bright meteor 

 which has illuminated m.v pathway in life, and can deliver the goods in 

 wholesale quantities, you are it. 



Dear .Tack, Ijelieve me to be, yours with a heart full uf thanks, and an 

 office full of truck. 



Jack has never repeated the offense, while the aforesaid lumberman 



has congratulated himself a number of times on his ability to head 

 off such attempts to make a store-house of his office. 



"SOME MASHER." 



Last summer F. E. Miller, traveling representative of the Gayoso 

 Lumber Company, Memphis, Tenn., decided to make headquarters at 

 one of Minnesota's delightful summer resorts and finally located 

 quarters for hmiself, wife and child at one of the hotels on Lake 

 Chisago. 



Mr. Miller and -family arrived at the hotel, which is located on an 

 island, late in the evening and were shown to an upstairs room in 

 the main building. He states that hanng had a strenuous day he 

 was very tired and hastily undressing threw himself upon the bed. 

 It is necessary to state here that Mr. Miller 

 belongs, dressed or undressed, in President 

 Taft's class for size and is not of a build 

 calculated to safely drop from any extended 

 height, and in this case when he let himself 

 go in the abandon of luxurious freedom from 

 conventional trappings, the bed capitulated at 

 once and, as Mr. Miller graphically stated, 

 "The whole condemned thing went down and 

 the head of the bed also fell over on me with 

 a crash similar to the Republican defeat last 

 November. ' ' 



He states, however, that he was so over- 

 joyed at not going through the floor to the 

 hasement that he and his wife spent the bal- 

 ance of the night in thankful praj'ers that the 

 catastrophe had been no worse, and he did 

 say that he could overlook the bed falling, but 

 thought insult was added to injury when he 

 was smashed on the noodle by the head of 

 the bed. 



ilemphis lumbeimeu with whom -Mr. Miller 

 is very popular and who have heard of his ex- 

 perience have advocated his concern providing 

 him with a rope and tackle for easy entrance 

 to future country beds. 



The Camphor Industry 



The world 's production of camphor is 

 placed at 12,000,000 pounds, of which Japan 

 supplies 6,000,000, most of which is produced 

 in Formosa. China produces 1,300,000 pounds. Synthetic camphor, 

 which is manufactured largely from turpentine, is now an im- 

 portant article in the can-.phor market. Genuine camphor is made 

 from finely-chipped wood, and involves the destruction of the trees. 



Review of Forestry Work 



The Forest Service has published a pamphlet, ' ' Review of Forest 

 Service Investigations, Volume 1," which is a departure from pub- 

 lications heretofore issued. It is stated in the preface that it is 

 intended primarily for those engaged in forestry work, but that a 

 limited number of copies will be distributed among others who are 

 interested. The pamphlet gives an account of what the Forest 

 Service is doing and expects to do. Those who examine the pages 

 will be surprised to learn the scope of the work and the wide range 

 of subjects which it covers. There is activity from Maine to Cali- 

 fornia, and from Florida to Minnesota. A good many matters are 

 discussed informally, which have not been treated in regular bul- 

 letins. It is, in fact, what might properly be called a progress re- 

 port. It is proposed to issue others from time to time as suitable 

 material accumulates. It may be expected that good results will 

 follow, because the Forest Service has grown so large and its 

 activities are so varied that some such means are necessarj' to keep 

 all parts in touch. 



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LBIST. 



