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Pert^ Pertinent and Impertinent 



A littlo more tired at close of day: 

 A little less anxious to have our way ; 

 A little less ready to scold and blame, 

 A little more care for a brother's name ; 

 And so we are nearing the journey's end 

 Where time and eternity meet and blend. 



A little less care for bonds and gold. 

 A little more zest in the days of old, 

 A broader view and saner mind, 

 And a little more love for all mankind ; 



The Border Lights 



And so wG are faring a-down the way 

 That leads to the gates of a better day. 



A little more love for the friends of youth. 

 A little less zeal for established truth, 

 A little more charity in our views. 

 A little less thirst for the daily news; 

 And so we are folding our tents away 

 And passing in silence at close of day. 



A little more leisure to sit and dream. 

 A little more real the things unseen. 



A little nearer to those ahead. 

 With visions of those long-loved and dead : 

 And so we are going where all must go, 

 To the place the living may never know. 



— RoUin J. Wells. 

 It Pays to Advertise 

 It is a well known fact that the reason hens' 

 eggs are more generally consumed than duck eggs 

 is because of the fact that a duck lays an egg and 

 hides it away while a hen lays an egg and never 

 gets through telling about it. 



SPECIOUS NON-ADVERTISING ARGUMENT 



Smith: What in the mischief are you doing? 



Jones: Well, you see it is this way. Sometimes business is so good that the sign doesn't help any, and at other times business is 

 so poor that a sign will do no good — so I am taking it down. 



He Took Chances 



A jndcc in .1 western town had declared that 

 he would stop the carrying of firearms on the 

 street. Before him appeared for trial a tough 

 youth charged with getting drunk and firing his 

 revolver in a crowded street. 



"Twenty dollars and costs," said the magis- 

 trate. 



"But, your honor." interposed counsel for 

 the prisoner, "my client did not hit anybody." 



"Why you admit that he fired the gun?" 



"Yes. but he fired it into the .lir," explained 

 the lawyer. 



"Twenty dollars and costs," repeated the 

 judge. "He might have shot an angel." 



Puzzle — Where Was He? 



It happened the otlier evening, and now a 

 certain clubman is trying to figure out how he 

 will square things with his wife the next time 

 he is "detained" downtown. He was not going 

 home for dinner, and when his wife answered 

 the telephone he said : "Don't wait for me at 

 dinner this evening, dear. I shall be detained 

 on business." 



"Very well," she replied. "I'm sorry you 



can't come home; but business is business, I 

 suppose. Where are you now?" 



"Where am I ? In my office of course. I have 

 had a very busy day." 



"It's too bad you have to work so hard, 

 George. But tell me something." 



"Yes, dear. What is it?" 



"How can you keep your mind on business 

 with the orchestra playing 'Every Little 

 Movement?" — Ladies' Borne Journal. 



There's a lot of difference between being blind 

 to the faults of your friends and winking at 

 their vices. 



—19— 



