26 



HARDWOOD RECORD 



P^rt, Pertinent and Impertinent 



The Prudent Toast 

 At tlio punch bowl's brink. 

 Let the thirsty thinlt, 

 What they say in Japan. 

 "First the man talies a diinli, 

 Then the drinli takes a drink, 

 Then the drink takes the man.' 



Kismet 

 Jack Sprat t could not get fat, 



I-Iis wife could not get lean ; 

 Although they ate three meals a day 

 And lots of things between. 



— Carolyn 'Wei.ls. 



Getting Rid of Him 

 Heed this lesson on the way- 



Spriugtime. or in snow : 

 "When the devil is to pay, 



Pay him — so he'll go." 



The thirst to know and understand, 

 A large and liberal discontent ; 



These are the goods in life's rich hand, 

 The things that are more excellent. 



■ — William Watso.v. 



Cleverness dwells in marble halls ; genius re- 

 sides in an attic. 



Joy of Living 



"Live, laugh and love 1" It's a world of joy 



To him with a gift for dreaming I 

 A million fairies are spreading roses 



Where dews like jewels are gleaming ! 

 It's a mighty fine world, full of mighty fine folks, 



And only the sluggard Is sad I 

 I'm glad I'm living. I'm glad you're living, 



And I'm glad that you're glad that I'm glad. 

 — S-r. Paul Dispatch. 



■■.Most people succeed not because of brains, 

 I'ut because they are workers. Work never kills, 

 hut worry does. Enthusiasm is the white heat 

 which melts obstacles. The enthusiastic man 

 tackles the hard things first. The first task for 

 the modern business man should be to sum up 

 rod organize himself." 



As a rule you can form a fairly accurate opin- 

 ion of what your neighbors think of you by what 

 they say of others. 



Forest Fires 



The public is at last waking up. 



Jack Says 



That economy Is the word used by our neighbor 

 ■with reference to his stinginess. 



That a wise woman will choose the "slow 

 coach" In preference to the fast male. 



That the woman who named her son Itomeo 

 did a quite unnecessary thing. 



That a fool and his advice arc soon parted. 



That some one should urge the gossips to 

 organize in favor ot Shorter hours. — Ethel 

 Claibb. 



Some men's idea of success is revealed in the 

 only two objects they have in life — to become 

 rich and then to become richer. 



The average married man's idea of frenzied 

 finance is to get hold of a few dollars that his 

 wile doesn't know anything about. 



You get a lot more fun out of trying to get 

 there than out of the real thing. 



Our mistakes ot yesterday are responsible for 

 our worries of today. 



When Fame and Fortune travel together Fame 

 usually takes a back seat. 



Some men are so busy being lazy that they 

 haven't time for anything else. 



Opportunity passes behind the man who waits 

 for It. 



"The way of the transgressor Is hard." It 

 ought to be, after all the travel that's passed 

 over It 



Keep good company and you'll be of them. 



Sometimes a man doggedly saves his pennies 

 and his dollars are blown In by his heirs. 



When a man tries to drown his troubles he 

 Invariably thinks his trouble Is In his stomach. 



