HARDWOOD RECORD 



25 



ture, fixtures and musical instruments. Gum's ability to hold glue 

 fits it for fine work. It is the surface material, the visible outside, 

 and the veneer is usually laid over other woods vfhich are called the 

 core or backing. 



Fixtures and other articles are made of solid gum, also, and the 

 solid TPood is used in much larger quantities than the veneer. It is 



handled in many lengths, breadths, and thicknesses. It mills well, 

 and takes artistic grooving and beading. This is a very important 

 matter in the manufacture of fixtures, because broad surfaces and 

 long edges are to be relieved by ornamental work. Gum is in much 

 demand as a carving material, and rates with cherry, walnut, and 

 mahogany in that respect. 



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Tales of the Trade 



DIDN'T FOOL HIM 



They are up to things in Ridgway, Pa., all the time, whether they 

 are bankers, all-round capitalists or just plain lumbermen — and the 

 town has more than its share of all them, which may account for its 

 uptoitiveness, so to speak. A lumberman of that town (ho admits 

 it himself) onct- went down to Gotham and was taken for a hayseed, 

 not only by ordinary citizens, but by a very fine gentleman whom he 

 met in the park and wlio ought to have known better, for it is his 

 business to know people better than they know themselves. 



The conversation was of the most engaging sort. The gentleman 

 told so many fine stories of himself that the Ridgewayite was moved 

 to speak of his business and his home town now and then as a matter 

 of courtesy. They parted excellent friends, though never to meet 

 again, which was quite regretted by at least one of them. Shortly 

 afterwards the good lumberman was profusely greeted by a fine- 

 appearing young man who knew more of his business and connections 

 than he did himself, and who had often seen him at a certain home 

 hotel which he named. 



Then the visitor tumbled. He saw the hole in the grindstone that 

 gentleman No. Two had come through after a hasty little talk with 

 gentleman No. One. The time had been so short that it would seem 

 impossible to transmit so much history. 



The visitor winked his other eye. ' ' You have waked up the wrong 

 passenger, my kidlet, ' ' he said. ' ' Better run along. Maybe your pal 

 has hooked an easy one by this time. I have been there and haven 't 

 time to go over to that saloon for a little game."- 



The only question left over is. How much did that very convenient 

 knowledge cost him at the time he got it? 



THE Al^NTJAL SUMMER DULLNESS EXPLAINED 



Our friend, President H. T. Peuuypacker, is a lumberman by the 

 slack-cooperage route and he turns out more barrels that make a 

 bluff of holding flour and other groceries than any one else in Buffalo, 

 his Quaker City shops making its bow for that class of trade just be- 

 fore the city mQls struck the 4,000,000-barrel gait in the flour trade. 



He is getting the sad notion in these degenerate days of the coop- 

 erage trade that the millers are on the verge of putting about 3,999,- 

 999 barrels of their flour into something besides wood, so that the 

 joke is mostly on him anyhow. Still he likes a jest so weU that he 

 is willing to do most of the laughing when it is all on him. 



He has not yet given up expressions of mirth over a pleasantry that 

 was perpetrated on him sometime ago at the city Chamber of Com- 

 merce by a friend. Having occasion to be introduced to a visitor 

 it came up by way of giving him a character that he was a slack 

 cooper by profession. 



' ' WeU, what is a slack cooper, anyhow f ' ' queried the innocent third 

 party. 



' ' A slack cooper, my dear sir, ' ' explained the mutual acquaintance, 

 "is a man who attends to business in the morning and goes to the 

 ball game in the afternoon. ' ' 



DISCRETION (?) IS THE BETTER PART OF VALOR 



Thomas B. Hoffman of the J. S. Kent Company, tells this little 

 joke in connection with the get-together dinner given to the retailers 

 and planing millmen of Philadelphia by the Philadelphia Wholesale 

 Lumber Dealers ' Association, some time ago. Mr. Hoffman, extremely 

 desirous tliat as many as possible of his retail friends should be pres- 

 ent on this occasion, called upon a number who had received invita- 

 tions to make sure. One after another made excuses, some plausible. 



others flimsy; liiKilly one, more lionest than the rest, came out boUly 

 with the confession that there would be so many wholesalora there 

 lie would be ashamed to face them. 



HE SHOULD HAVE TRIED ANGEL FOOD 



Benjamin Stoker of George W. Stoker & Son, and president of the 

 Lumbermen 's Kxchange of Philadelphia, tells an amusing incident of 

 one of the trips he often takes. While stopping at a restaurant at 

 which he is a frequent visitor, Mrs. Stoker made out the order for 

 dinner, and Mr. Stoker, well pleased with her selection, merely 

 nodded to the waiter, and said "ditto." Cuffy soon returned, set 

 down Mrs. Stoker's order, then turned with perplexed brow to Mr. 

 Stoker and asked "What was that you ordered, Mr.?" "I said 

 ' ditto, ' ' ' replied Mr. Stoker, enjoying the waiter 's confusion. ' ' There 

 aint no ditto on the menu, Mr. Least ways, not any just now. Mr.," 

 apologized poor Cuffy. 



TRUE TO HIS FAITH 



At a recent entertainment and banquet, John J. Guiniveu, a cracker- 

 Jack salesman of the Producers' Lumber Company, Philadelphia, and 

 a jovial Celt, created great laughter when in the course of a little 

 talk which was permitted him he humbly expressed the wish that if 

 the present delectable occasion were to be repeated they would kindly 

 forget there was such a day in the week as Friday, as— as— and 

 then followed, in Mr. Guiniven's inimitable style, a rich fish story, 

 which paradoxical as it would seem, was not a fish story at all. No, 

 indeed! A year ago Mr. Guiniven said he attended the annual ban- 

 quet of the Pennsylvania Lumbermen's Association, which came off 

 on Friday. The first course served was oysters, good; the next, 

 fish; then tenderloin of beef. Mr. Guiniven, who thought he recog- 

 nized in the waiter a fellow countryman, asked him in a wliisper, if 

 he was an Irishman. "I am, thot," he replied. "So am I," said 

 Mr. Guiniven. "Shall I bring you another coorse of fish, sor?" 

 asked the waiter. "You may," said Mr. Guiniven. Then they 

 brought fowl. "Another coorse of fish, sor?" "Sure," said Mr. 

 Guiniven, and so on until he had had five courses of fish and the 

 bones were beginning to feel their way through. "Oh, no, Fridays 

 are not for banquets, my way of thinking, ' ' said Mr. Guiniveu. 

 IF LOEVENHART WOULD ONLY QUIT HIS "TRIFLIN" " 



I'. J. Loevenhart represented the Nashville Lumbermen's Club on 

 the tour of the South recently by the Nashville Boosters' Club on a 

 special train. The local lumbermen determined to have some fun at 

 the expense of Mr. Loevenhart. With the co-operation of A. B. 

 Ransom, president of the Commercial Club, and head of large hard- 

 wood interests, who was on the trip, they succeeded in making Mr. 

 Loevenhart believe that his services were ill appreciated. Various 

 telegrams (?) were framed up by Hamilton Love and others and 

 delivered to him at different points, complaining of the dissatisfac- 

 tion he was causing by failing to do anything on the trip to bring 

 the lumber interests to the front. To make matters worse some of 

 the boosters told Mr. Loevenhart it was all due to the press cor- 

 respondents who had entered a scheme to ignore him. Mr. Loeven- 

 hart went to the press men and gave them a warm roasting, which 

 they indignantly resented. The booster lumberman, however, learned 

 on his return that it was all a " frame up " on him, and that his work 

 on presenting facts as to Nashville's annual lumber business of over 

 $11,000,000 was duly recognized. Mr. Ransom, however, insists that 

 Mr. Loevenhart did spend too much time distributing perfume and 

 other articles among the ladies in some of the cities visited. 



