HARDWOOD RECORD 



15 



Vert, Pertinent and Impertinent. 



Is It Any Sin? 



God made man frail as a bubble. 



i;u(I madi' love and love made (rouble. 



(Jcid made wine — is it any sin 



I'or man lo drinii wine to drown trouble in? 



Disregarded. 



"The world rolls round forever like n mill. 

 It f;rinds out death and life and good and ill : 

 yinn might know one thing were his sight less 



dim ■. 

 That it whirls not to .suit his pett.v whim. 

 That it is quite indifferent to him." 



His Extremity. 



U ver.v weepsouii; was the Fate 



Of .voung Abijah Uoot : 

 He sought the Hand of Sally Smith. 



.\nd got — hei* Father's Foot. 



LlPPINTOTT'S. 



Necessary. 

 Inspiration acts as 

 a starter to the 

 wheels of industry, 

 but it takes perspira- 

 tion to keep them go 

 ing. 



True. 



Some men are 

 known by the work 

 tliev rpiuse to do. 



Both Fall Down. 



It takes a man to 

 preach constancy and 

 a woman to preach 

 consistency, but 

 neither practice eith- 

 er to anj' consider- 

 able extent. 



Wild Oats. 



The trouble about 

 sowing wild oats is 

 that you have to buy 

 your own crop and 

 pay a good price for 

 it. 



A Hint. 



The man who has 

 really made good 

 doesn't have to blow 

 his own horn. 



Scandal. 



A bit of scandal 

 gives a delightful 

 flavor to one 's coffee. 



Saturated. 

 Some men's high- 

 est idea of good is of 

 itself evil. 



THE QUESTION. 



Vacations. 



Most of lis would 

 eu.joy yoiug on a va- 

 cation more if we 

 didn't meet so many 

 people going to the 

 very place we are 

 leaving for tlieir va- 

 cations. 



Not Always. 

 B 11 d ding genius 

 doesn't always bear 

 fruit. 



Attractive. 

 A great many peo- 

 ple are interested in 

 the man whose prin- 

 ciple is for sale. 



Something New. 



There 's nothing 

 new under the sun — 

 except methods of dis- 

 torting the truth. 



Always Employed. 

 He who attends to 

 his own business is 

 never out of a job. 



Good Intentions. 



W'lieu the average 

 man makes a mistake 

 lie tries to justify 

 liiniself by referring 

 to his good intentions. 



The Time. 



IIovv many people's 

 gratitude is greatest 

 just before you make 

 them a loan! 



Do you love me for myself alone ? 



Well Postponed. 



Two tilings tluit arc 

 best left over for to- 

 morrow are fault-find- 

 ing and criticizing. 



Spoiled. 



A good story is often spoiled in the telling 

 by the man who sits nervously in the crowd, 

 afraid that he won't get a chance to spring 

 his own storv. 



Egotism. 



Egotism is a disease for which there 

 seems to be no cure this side of the grave; 

 anil even tlien it often breaks out on the 

 tombstone. 



Not Needed. 



So many men have the faculty of never 

 being on hand when wanted that the world 

 soon learns to get along very nicely without 

 til em. 



Kara Avis. 

 Everybody has heard of the poor and 

 proud, but who ever heard of the. rich and 

 humble! 



Takes Diplomacy. 

 People are like pitchers — there is a handle 

 to every disposition if you only know how 

 to take hold of it. 



The Point. 



Certainly a satisfied customer is an excel- 

 lent advertisement, but the difficulty is to 

 get the customer to satisfy. 



Alike. 



Opportunities are like eggs in that they 

 must be hatched while they -are fresh. 



Opportunity. 



"The space between a man's ideal and 

 1 lie uiau himself is his op|iovtunity. ' ' 



Quite So. 



It isn't what a man owes, but what he 

 pays that kec|is him poor. 



