Uncle Jotham's Boarder 



"He had an old bait-net of thin, rotten stuff 

 That a minner could bite his way through; 



But he never went fishin' — at least, in the way 

 That fishermen gen'ally do; 



But he carried that bait-net wherever he went; 

 The handle was j'inted in two. 



"And the bottles and boxes that chap fetched along! 

 Why, a doctor would never want more; 

 If they held pills and physic, he 'd got full enough 



To fit out a medicine-store. 

 And he 'd got heaps of pins, dreffle lengthy and slim. 

 AUers droppin' about on the floor. 



"Well, true as I live, that old feller just spent 

 His hull days in loafin' about 

 And pickin' up hoppers and roaches and flies — 



Not to use for his bait to ketch trout. 

 But to kill and stick pins in and squint at and all. 

 He was crazy 's a coot, th' ain't no doubt. 



"He 'd see a poor miller a-flyin' along, — 



The commonest, every-day kind, — 

 And he 'd waddle on arter it, fat as he was, 



And foller up softly behind, 

 Till he 'd flop that-air bait-net right over its head, 



And I 'd laugh till nigh out of my mind. 



"Why, he 'd lay on the ground for an hour at a stretch 



And scratch in the dirt like a hen; 

 He 'd scrape all the bark off the bushes and trees, 



And turn the stones over; and then 

 He 'd peek under logs, or he 'd pry into holes. 



I 'm glad there ain't no more sech men. 



"My wife see a box in his bedroom, one day, 



Jest swarmin' with live caterpillars; 

 He fed 'em on leaves off of all kinds of trees — 



The ellums and birches and willers; 

 And he 'd got piles of boxes, chock-full to the top 



With crickets and bees and moth-millers. 



"I asked him, one time, what his business might be. 

 Of course, 1 fust made some apology. 

 He tried to explain, but such awful big words! 



Sorto' forren, outlandish, and coUegey. 

 'S near 's 1 can tell, 'stead of enterin' a trade, 

 He was tryin' to jest enter viology. 

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