92 FISHES OF FANCY. 



majesty of the water- worlds, and arrange for holding the next Exhi- 

 bition — at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean." 



When he had finished speaking, the whole aquarium began firing 

 off motions and amendments, and as the electric eels in their excite- 

 ment began to get luminous, there was sufficient light to see the Irish- 

 member kind of scene that ensued. Each fish had apparently moved 

 that the Exhibition be immediately adjourned to its own particular 

 habitat, and as the fresh-water creatures could not agree with the salt- 

 water ones, they all began behaving like French Deputies. But the 

 sea-things proved, on the vote which was ultimately taken, to be 

 greatly in the majority, and though the fresh-water fish kept on rising 

 to questions of privilege and points of order, and otherwise obstruct- 

 ing, the original motion, thanks to the assiduous hammering of the 

 hammer-headed shark, was eventually carried. 



It was to the effect that the next Great Interoceanic Fisheries 

 Exhibition be held in the middle of the South Atlantic— with an 

 ironical amendment by the white whale that if the site did not 

 commend itself to the fresh-water fish, they might hold an Exhibition 

 of their own in any "land-puddle" they liked. An executive com- 

 mittee was at once appointed, the Gulf Stream fixed upon as the 

 central office, the Sea-Serpent invited to be present on the opening 

 day, and the prizes scheduled. Gold and silver medals were awarded 

 for the whales that sank the biggest schooner and drowned the most 

 Dundee whalers respectively ; the same for the sharks that swallowed 

 the biggest man (if dressed in tarpaulins at the time an extra honour- 

 able mention) ; and the same for the sword-fishes that rammed their 

 snouts deepest into ships. The list was a very long one — for every 

 fish had a suggestion to make for its own benefit — and it closed with a 

 copper badge for the oyster that could choke an American. 



All seemed happily settled, and the meeting was relapsing into 

 quiescence, when I became aware of a deputation of monsters in the 

 aisle on my left. It was the sea-animals, who had been patiently 

 waiting to see what arrangements would be made for them, and the 

 silence was now broken by the voice of an aged walrus hoarsely 

 inquiring whether he was a fish. A " movement," as the French say, 

 was at once apparent in the assembly, but no one replied. " For," said 

 the walrus, " it appears to me that, as I am fished for, I am a fish, 

 and entitled, therefore, to be treated as such." A chorus of approval 

 broke from the narwhals, seals, sea-lions, manatees, and dugongs, and 

 the argument finding no contradiction, it was agi'eed that some ice- 

 bergs and other conveniences should be provided for the animals. 



