652. 
T made an experiment upon his heart, 
as he willtell sou, and own that I was 
moe its first passion. F felt a wish to 
hear from himself the history of his mind, 
and to pour the balm of pity into the 
wounds of love. My experiment suc- 
ceeded; the shock of jealousy was ap- 
parent. J did not like to see lim suffer, 
and almost instantly told him that the 
intelligence was fabulous, and invented 
for atest of the truth of the report which 
bad reached me. He ingenuously ac- 
knowledyed that it was not unfounded, 
talked freely to me of his impression and 
of its hopeless nature. It was only in 
the latter part of many weeks’ association 
that he gave me slight and transient 
hints of transferring attachment. 
The regiment then removing, we se- 
parated with tender, but not visibly 
impassioned regret. ‘Two years after, 
in the winter, 1764, we met accidentally - 
in London, renewed our friendship, which 
soon became mutual, and ackuowledged 
Tove; but in him so apparently reasonable 
and serene, as not cnce to inspire an 
idea that, if authority should break our 
engavement, his passion would prove 
unextinguishable. My father, on dis- 
coverirg, disapproved and dissolved it, 
I believed that so placid a lover would 
not suffer severely from the disappoint- 
ment, nor once tnagined that his attach- 
ment would be proof against time. This 
nviction extinguished that part of my 
wu regard, which was more tender than 
esteem, and left my heart Vagayt to re- 
ceive another impression more instant 
and enthusiastic than [ had ever pre- 
viously experienced, Tts vivacity induced 
me to think that L had till then mistaken 
friendship for love. ‘fhis happened the 
ensuing year, 1765. VYhe inspirer was 
the present general, ctheu Cornet V 4 
a native of Lichfield, but absent. six 
years to receive a military education in 
France. and at Dublin, where he was 
page to the Jord-leutenant. At that 
period he returned, with the 
graces of early youth, the diynity of man- 
hood, and with politeness which had the 
first polish. Ue was tall, and, in my 
eyes, extremely ‘lovely. Lf my suscepu- 
tility uf these attractions was culpable 
“fAckleness to Mr. T >» Mr... V——’5 
Hiconstancy to me avenved it at full. 
Dunng three months, in which we 
were frequently together, V—— had ap- 
peared essiduously attentive, and ardently 
attached tome. His behaviour then 
suddenly aliered from enamoured fervour 
united | 
Letters of Anna Seward. 
to cool civility, bordering upot uttet 
nevleet. Bigs 
I believed this change resulted frony 
higher views, excited from ambitions 
awakened by the remonstrance of a per- 
son whom he believed bis friend, end 
who, E knew, was not mine. His father 
and sisters had observed our growing ate 
tachment with pleasure, and seemed to 
regret its dissoluuon. ; 
I felt, during a short time, tortured 
and wreeched in the extreme; but T had 
pride, ligh spirits, intellectual resources, 
and fancied myself not born to be the 
victim of contemned affection. I re- 
sulted, however, tot again to hope that 
I could be the object of lasting passion. 
I had proposals of marriage frozn several, 
whom my father wishe ‘to approve ; 
but such sort of overtures, not preceded 
by assiduous tenderness, amt which ex- 
pected to reap the harvest of love with- 
out having nursed its germs, suited not 
my native ethos or were calcu- 
lated to inspire it. ad known what 
it was tu love, to all the excess of the 
seutiment; and the sweetness and viva- 
city of the impression, though obliterated 
by ingratitude, was not forgutten. My 
liberty seemed a thousand times pref 
rable to the dispiriting fetters of au un- 
impassioned connexion. 
The changed V. , soon after desert= 
ing me, joined his regiment in Treland, 
and stad there two years. (C* Ins return, 
he attached himself to one of wy most 
intimate friends; a graceful but not beau- 
uful young lady. Her fortune, in her 
OWN possession, exceeded my future 
prospects. Yes, to her he devoted his 
attentions, on whose hosam I had shed 
those mingled tears of indignation and 
lacetated tenderness which he had caused 
to flow. : j 
Their loves, however, nothing weak- 
ened my amity to her; they carried with 
them my best wishes to the altar, and I 
heard their nuptial peals without a sigh. 
She died in childbirth the next year 
lier early fate excited my sorrow, and 
his sufferings my sympathy.’ I wrote a 
monody on her death. It hasnever been 
published, but may one day appear ina 
collection of my poems. 
General, then captain V , after the 
elapse ofa few Sears, married the daughe 
ter ofa man of rank; and high in mili 
tary command, and soon again ‘becaine 
a widower, By the co-operation of hig 
father-in-law’s interest, with the distin-~ 
My 
guished gallantry of his own conduct, 
: te eae the 
‘ 
Nt nin 4 — pe Snes 
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—s 
