JS21.] 



VApe Italitma—No. XXII. 



actually promoted me (o the honour of 

 inditiug letters for him. He envied me, 

 ho\ve%'er, this little compliment to my 

 vanity, hy requesting to correct them 

 before they were dispatched ; and I 

 suppose in the end he would have 

 brought nie over to his opinion that I 

 was not compos mentis^ if I had not 

 speedily convinced him to the con- 

 trary. 



He at length allowed me to take 

 breath — and it was sweet to rest though 

 but for a moment. I still, however, 

 appeared occupied, made a grand shew 

 of manuscripts, and affected a mysteri- 

 ous look. Then I took an opportunity 

 of filching secrets from his letters or 

 portfolio — gave car to the doors and 

 walls, and reported my information 

 whei-e I chose: soon, by making my*e(^ 

 scarce^ answering in shert replies, &c., 

 I established a reputation for prudence 

 in the opinion of the wisest around me. 

 At last, the manner in which I had been 

 exercising my diplomatic talents was 

 discovered, and my old patron drove 

 me somewhat rudely from his presence, 

 and did what he could to prevent me ob- 

 taining another situation. Inowresolv- 

 ed to revenge myself at once upon him 

 and the world, by publishing. I muster 

 up my finest manuscripts — ^my extempo- 

 raneous and my non-exteinporaneoiis 

 effusions — they are arranged, — in the 

 press, and my work appeared. The 

 gentle public fixed a zoilus-tooth in it 

 immediately ; 1 was pronx)imced a pla- 

 giarist, and every thing which was bad. 

 Still I tried to stem the current of pub- 

 lic opinion, frequented academies and 

 private circles, modestly canvassing 

 for votes in my own favour, as no one 

 else would appear for me. T talked of 

 new theories, the spirit of the age, re- 

 cited a platonic ode on music, in two 

 aud twenty strophes, each of twenty 

 verses; haunted the houses of the 

 great with new letters of recommenda- 

 tion ; buried myself up to the ears in 

 poetry and philosophy, without meeting 

 with a single Maecenas. 



Such reflections upon my genius call- 

 ed for an exemplary punishment. After 

 a monient's consideration, I resolved to 

 change both my name aud my occupa- 

 tion, and forthwith joined a company — 

 not of actors, but of journalists. Here 

 fame attended me — my anonymous sa- 

 tires were biting ; my controversies 

 with other editors dreadful to peruse : 

 ".for a slice of bread and a plate of good 

 '^up, I Would have written up one paper, 

 '^^aiMl written down its adversary, with 

 '• Monthly Mag. No 355. 



517 



the enthusiasm of a patriot. I stung 

 mauy'authors to the quick, for what I 

 had formerly suflered ; revenged my- 

 self on my past, discomfited my pre- 

 sent, and anticipated my future ene- 

 mies. I was returning home one (wen- 

 ing from the publishers — it was ;.bout 

 midnight and frightfully dark — I met 

 with a severe bastinado. 



SEIZED WITH HYDROPHOBIA. 



I don't kno'.v how it was, but so much 

 fatigue, watching, and disappointment, 

 began sensibly to affect my health. My 

 spirits began to gloom and give way, 

 my nerves were agitated, and my ima- 

 gination fuil.of devils. The thing began 

 to look a little serious. I worked very 

 little, aud was badly paid. I still con- 

 thiued to haunt the more retired parts 

 of the town, and under the veil of twi- 

 light visited my editors occasionally in 

 a small way. ftly society was .confined 

 to that of an apothecary, three poor 

 priests, and a young black M'hom I was 

 instructing " in the ways of booksel- 

 lers," and who listened to my oracles 

 with due respect, as we sat over a 

 wretched fire. In spite of the most re- 

 gular and rigorous diet, with an accom- 

 panying regimen of mind (hard work), 

 I daily got worse and worse, aud was 

 at last driven by my sufferings to con- 

 sult a physician, Mho informed me I 

 ^^ls subject to the inciebiis. 



I thus unbosomed myself to him : — 

 " The source of all my troubles, Doc- 

 tor, lies in the triumph of injustice 

 over genius, and the prosperity of ig- 

 norance — but you will have read more, 



of this in the third volume of my " 



The Doctor interrupted me, protest- 

 ing upon his honour that hehad^neven- 

 had the pleasure — that it was quite 

 new to him thnt I had ever made 

 my appearance in the literary world. 

 There was no bearing this: I felt 

 a siulden excess of rage, and was 

 strongly tempted to seize the informant 

 by his throat. I contented myself, how- 

 ever, with fixing my teeth in the 

 fleshy part of his arm, and refusing 

 either to eat or drink- for a week, and 

 my jaw was spontaneously locked. 

 " THE consi;ltation." 



The Doctor now became truly anx- 

 ious about his patient — in fact, he 

 thought that I was mad, and observed 

 my symptoms with evident dread. Two 

 other physicians were directly sum- 

 moned, and a surgeon followed them 

 into my chamber. The formalities 

 were less than usual on such occasions ; 

 they sat down at once, but the two la«t 

 3T would 



