1825.) 
poker,— instead of his present long whip. 
The guard, also, will exhibit a similar 
improvement of characteristic to the eye 
of genuine taste, by substituting a brace 
of water-buckets for his pistol-holsters, 
and using a wet mop instead of a blun- 
derbuss. 
As to the probability of an occasional 
blow-up, this can scarcely be a matter of 
reasonable objection on the part of the 
travellers, whounscrupulously trust their 
limbs and lives in the hands of the 
racing and opposition coachmen, and 
are accustomed to the regular d/ow-up 
between the rival parties, at various 
incidental points of the road. Besides, 
any Joint-Stock Life-Insurance Com- 
pany, already started, or tobe started, 
would, doubtless, for a reasonable addi- 
tion of premium, assure the lives of the 
steam-coach passengers; and the scale 
of remuneration might be managed in 
somewhat the following manner :— 
Loss of an arm, by explosion 
Loss of a leg.... ditto .......0....-. 
Ditto, attended bya flight @ la voltageuse 5 
Ditto, spread-eagle over a quickset hedge 6 
Blowing off the head (to be paid to the 
CRGCHEGES)} 3 fapsps o6as8 aes) © eyduanpt mayen 8 
In fine, the great discovery of steam 
might yet be infinitely extended in its 
application ; but further speculation, on 
its applicability to a€rostation, is reserved 
for a future disquisition on that particu- 
lar head. But, in the mean while, we 
consider the proof to be made out, that 
the expensive employment of horses in 
stage-coaches is no longer necessary. 
But, talking of horses, why, indeed, 
should we confine the advantages of the 
application of steam to carriages? Why 
should we not have new :clavilenos,* 
-with pegs for guiding them, and valves 
for abating, or diminishing their mettle, 
at pleasure? This period, which may 
be named the “ Copper Age,” will cer- 
tainly arrive. Sundry clerks, in Rotten- 
row, will nolonger, from financial neces- 
sity, but choice, sport nags of neither 
bone nor blood; and the braziers may, 
at one and the same time, supply our 
dandies with their spurs and their 
“ copper fillies.” A farrier may turn 
his hand to making horses, instead of 
shoeing them: and a blacksmith’s shop 
* Ina provincial paper, some two, or three, 
or perhaps more years ago, there was an 
account of a gentleman crossing from Holy- 
head, in a steam packet, to join a friend at 
a hunt in the “ Emerald Isle ;” and, when 
in the course of conversation, this vapowry 
excursion was mentioned, the Irishman 
exclaimed, in true country phrase, “ By St. 
Patrick, we shall soon go a-hunting on our 
tea-kettles !’'—Eprr. 
Hints for a Joint-Stock Horse- Manufactory Company. 
413 
may supersede the mews and the horse- 
mart. Instead of a “horse eating his 
head off,’ as now, the horse, without 
any imputation on his good qualities, 
may be as deficient in head as his rider 
in the ring: and the riders, who are now 
too liable to be smoked themselves, may 
then be in a capacity to smoke every- 
body else. Such horses, besides being 
entirely free from vice, will be as pre- 
eminent in metal as in fire. The divine 
horses, celebrated by Homer and the 
romance-writers, could not with more 
strict propriety be said to havea “breath 
of flame.” They will, besides, eat 
nothing, drink nothing, and want very 
little grooming: docking and flogging 
will become obsolete; and breaking, 
which is now so important a ceremony, 
will, in the new case, be, as much as 
possible, to be deprecated. A great 
saving in saddlery will ensue, as.a matter 
of course: and no Cockney, in future, 
will be reduced to the disagreeable 
dilemma of deciding, when on the point 
of being unhorsed by his Pegasus, be- 
tween the advantages of grasping the 
tail, the mane, or the reins. 
Other advantages, resulting from this 
speculation, are too numerous to be 
recapitulated. Millions of acres, now 
sown with oats, may then be devoted to 
the growth of wheat and barley: so that 
the abundance of the first may induce 
the cheap bakers to desist from making 
their bread of ground Devonshire stone, 
alum, potatoes, &c. &c.; and the mere 
cheapness of malt tempt the “ genuine 
malt-and-hop brewers” to make their 
beer of it, imstead of their present 
favourite materials,—quassia, henbane, 
indicus, coculus, foxglove, and deadly 
nightshade.—The “Ill-treatment of Ani- 
mals Bill” may be rendered a dead letter 
by the invention of steam jack-asses, 
which may be thumped and bruised ad 
libitum. The nose will no longer be 
poisoned, nor the ear stunned, with 
the respective cries and exhalations of 
* Dogs’ meat!”? and “ Cats’ meat !”— 
Office-clerks may occasionally dine upon 
sausages in lane, without. fearing 
a nightmare-vision of the unfortunate 
animal thcy have embowelled.—- No 
patrician need over-exert himself, for 
the future, in learning at college the 
single art and science of coachmanship: 
the nobler animals, on the race-courses 
and in the mail-coaches, may be spared 
the costly exploit of “running against 
time;’”’ and apothecaries and dancing- 
masters, who now keep a carriage with 
one horse, may then be enabled to keep 
one with no horse at all! 
To the 
