366 Lecture on Verbicide — J5y a Man of the Law. [Aphii., 



wretched pun, which required a sort of Jewish pronunciation, to be per- 

 ceived, wretched as it was, and waxing wratli, so as to give up or lose 

 all command of a weapon, which every body knew to be ungovernable, 

 attacked a brother of his, and said, " a pun-ish-meant, brother so-and- 

 so," instead of saying, a pun-is-meant, brother so-and-so. — Adjudged a 

 clear case of deliberate and wilful verbicide. 



From these, which may be regarded as the leading or chief cases, 

 upon this particular department of our law, you may extract a variety 

 of principles, which, if they are assiduously applied, with a careful eye 

 and a steady hand, will go far toward guiding you out of, or into, as may 

 suit your purpose, what is profanely enough called the labyrinth of 

 the law. 



And here, if I were not afraid of taking up too much of your time 

 (hear, hear, hear I) I should endeavour to — (Great applause ; I take out 

 my watch. I bow three several times. Hear, hear, hear ! They persist — 

 I am overwhelmed with confusion, &c. &c.) — I should endeavour to add 

 a few brief remarks, for the benefit of such as feel a proud and praise- 

 worthy ambition, to excel in this or that high department of the law ; 

 and for the better understanding thereof, I would have undertaken to 

 a — a — allow me, therefore, young gentlemen, to finish my lecture, with 

 a few brief rules, and a few, may I venture to call them, rather happy 

 illustrations, by way of authority. 



Rule I. — Wliether your pun, joke or impromptu, be or be it not, un- 

 premeditated, contrive it so, if you wish to escape the law, that, when- 

 ever or wherever it occurs, it may appear to be altogether unpremeditated ; 

 for if any, the smallest possible doubt should arise, a shade or the 

 shadow of a shade, you are ex necessitate rei, without justification or 

 excuse. Foote's Maxims. 4. fol. 361. Ex. of Millar (Joe) vs. Hughes, 

 for piracy. MS. 



Cases. — Not long ago, there were two men by the name of Carew, 

 in the House of Commons. Great confusion prevailed in consequence ; 

 every body was inquiring what Carew ? and which Carew ? when either 

 Carew was named. At last, a member proposed that the names of the 

 two should be differently j)ronounced — as Carey and Carew, for example. 

 " Right," whispered our friend X. Y. Z. to the celebrated Mr. &c. <S:c. 

 " Right, I like the idea — we shall hear no more now, of what care I? 

 and what care you ?" 



Now, suppose that, in this very case, the same individual who pro- 

 posed the change of pronunciation, were the verj' individual who per- 

 petrated the pun,* what would follow, on hearing such a proposal, 

 accompanied with such a joke ? Any thing but a laugh, I dare say. 

 Who, in such a case, woidd believe the pun to be, what in truth it 

 might be nevertheless, unpremeditated ? Who would not believe that, 

 however plausible it might appear, the pun had been prepared for the 

 occasion, or the occasion for the pun ? Vide MS. Reports, unpub. 



Again. About five years ago. Lady C. D. was curvetting through Hyde 

 Park, with Col. F. G. ; her ladj'ship on a beautiful jade, about half Ara- 

 bian, he on a great roan charger. " Your ladyship, excuse me," said 

 the colonel, " the creature is getting restive ; a little more rein, your 

 ladyship — but your ladyship's 7-eign, will be too short, however much 

 you may lengthen it." Her ladyship was going to be married within a 



* See Rule II. 



