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1826.] Lecture on Verbicide — By a Man of the Lavo. 36^ 



Of course, he would wish to know the real difference : he shall be 

 gratified. A stratagem is a pun-trap, if it fail ; a pun is a stratagem if 

 it succeed. Treason, you know, never prospers — ^why ? Because if it 

 prosper, it is no longer treason. So with pun-traps ; they never prosper, 

 for, when they have prospered, they are no longer pun-traps. Stealing 

 is not legal, because, when legal, it is not stewing ; so with pun-traps. 

 Vide the Laws of Sparta ; by which it appears that boys were encou- 

 raged to steal, and punished when they were found out. Query, the 

 difference between tiie laws of Sparta and — the laws of the rest of the 

 world.* So, here, we encourage lawful stratagem, that is, every sort of 

 successful stratagem ; but we punish that which fails, under the name 

 of a trick, fraud, or pun-traj). 



Rule VII. — There should be a visible preparation, before a joke is let 

 off, a significance of attitude, a laugh, a look, a change of the voice, 

 or gesture, when it is let off, and if possible a look of temperate, cheer- 

 ful satisfaction afterwards. — N.B. This requires great dexterity. I lay 

 down the rule without qualification, having assured myself that sixteen 

 out of thirty-one judges have so decided. 



Rule VIII. — If the people about you do not happen to see your joke, 

 at once, do not be discouraged — try it again. Avoid what are called by 

 the sages of the law, jokes latent, or jokes which do not appear on the 

 very face of a proceeding. Jokes patent, or visible, open jokes, are to 

 be preferred in every case. In a word — 



Rules IX, X, XI. and XII. — If you write a joke, underscore it. 

 Show it up in capitals, or subdivide the syllables, or words, in such a 

 way that nobody can pass it over ; and if you utter a joke, which appears 

 to go off, not like a two-and-forty pounder, but like a flash in the pan, 

 watch your opportunity, and hitch in a sort of explanation ; try it in every 

 possible shape — never despair : you will most assuredly succeed if you run 

 through a series of approximating variations, till your auditors are awake, 

 or, what is much the same thing for you, asleep. Authorities hereafter. 



A2ml the first, 1826. Fiedrich Nichter. 



TO 



Yon bid me take my harp again — 



Alas ! 'tis tuneless now ; 

 I cannot raise the long-hush'd strain, 



Though she who bids is thou! 

 The high-toned chords of youthful gladness — 

 The softer notes which breathed of sadness — 

 And e'en those harsh and jarring strings 

 Which spoke severer visitings — 

 All, all are mute, disused, unstrung; 

 And long the rusting lyre has hung 

 Unheeded on the mouldering wall. 

 Until the very spiders crawl, 

 And weave their unbrush'd webs among 

 Those silent, frozen strings of song! 

 Sad and true emblem 'tis of all 



Neglect, uncleanness, and decay : 

 How soon oblivion's shadows fall ! 



How soon e'en mem'ry fades away ! 



* A part of this capital idea is borrowed. — F. N. 

 M. M. Ncm Serm.— Vol. I. No. 4.. 3 B 



