1831.] Affairs in General 313 



simplicity we had always conceived that fork was to knife, as man 

 and wife, a sort of undisseverable, at least till the banquet of life, and of 

 the table, were alike over. We cannot imderstand the two knives to 

 one fork, any more than a plurality in marriage. We beg to be in- 

 formed on this endeai'ing yet mysterious subject. 



There certainly is a guardian genius of riot especially in pay for the 

 benefit of Irish agitation — " a sweet little cherub that sits up aloft" — 

 for the perpetual O'Connelism of the " gem of the sea." The Dublin 

 election came in by " especial desire" to keep men's bloods in motion in 

 the interval, while the great agitator was making speeches here ; and it 

 worked well. Dublin, and with it all Ireland, was kept in a ferment 

 during every hour of the struggle ; puffing, paragraphing, and pugna- 

 city — as our alliterative friend, Derry Dawson, says — were the order of 

 the day ; and Alderman Harty was the pilot that was to carry the ship, 

 not through, but into the storm. The spirit of O'Connelism was victo- 

 rious. The popvdar heroes drove out the corporation heroes, and 

 George IMoore, the most Whiggish of Tories, and the greenest of 

 Orangemen, was tumbled down like another Phaeton, but with a gentler 

 destiny ; for, instead of breaking his bones, he dropped into the downy 

 pillows of a soft sinecure of three thousand a year. But the day of re- 

 action came, and the cold-blooded committee of the Commons merci- 

 lessly " resolved," in the following style — a style worthy of Rhadaman-f 

 thus himself: — 



" Resolved 1. That Robert Harty, Esq., the Right Hon. the Lord Mayor of 

 Dublin, and Lewis Perrin, Esq., were not duly elected citizens to serve in the 

 present Parliament. 



" Resolved 2. That the last election for the city of Dublin is null and void. 



" Resolved 3. That the petition against this return does not appear to this 

 committee either frivolous or vexatious. 



" Resolved 4. That the opposition to this petition does not appear to the com- 

 mittee either frivolous or vexatious. 



" Resolved 5. That R. Harty, Esq., the Right Hon. the Lord Mayor of Dublin, 

 and Lewis Perrin, Esq., had, through their agents, been guilty of bribery at the 

 last election. 



" Resolved G. That certain individuals holding official situations, who were con- 

 sidered to be connected with the government, did, in contravention to the orders 

 and rules of the Hottse of Commons, exercise undue influence at the last election for 

 citizens to serve in Parliament for the city of Dublin. And, 



" Resolved, lastly. That the chairman on presenting this report be instructed 

 to move that the report be printed, and also the evidence upon which it is founded." 



And to obtain this point of ambition, is said to have cost the candidates 

 £20,000 ! Perrin is a clever barrister, and should have had his brains 

 more at his own disposal, than to be tricked into the meshes of a set of 

 fellows who, after all, wanted nothing but to see " a capital roaring 

 election," good for the inn-keepers, the gin-shops, the five-pound voters, 

 and all other patriots of the same swallow. Yet Perrin, who is notori- 

 ously an excellent fellow, will make it up in the course of time. But 

 what in the name of Mammon and Belial, both orators and patriots as 

 they were, is to become of the Right Honourable the Lord Mayor ? 

 Perrin Btill has his briefs, and long may he live to puzzle judges, seduce 

 juries, shield smugglers, and prey upon mankind, according to the 

 duties of his profession. But what is to become of his imfortunate 

 coadjutor patriot .-' The Dublin papers are lively on the occasion; and, 



