^1831.] The Sycophant. 543 



uncle. The case is clear — clear at noon-day — he was jealous of the boy 

 — that is the simple fact — Oh ! it is clear — quite. Well — an open field 



and fair play, and my life on't he'll be a " but before the old 



gentleman could exactly determine what he should be — he was sound 

 asleep (it was after dinner) in his comfortably cushioned chair. 



There are many persons, and many occurrences, in the world which 

 tempt us to put much faith in Lord Bolingbroke's assertion, that " as 

 proud as we are of human reason, nothing can be more absurd than the 

 general system of human life and human knowledge." This is cer- 

 tainly true, and the theories of various speculators or philosophers, as 

 I believe it is the fashion to call any set of men who start a particularly 

 new or pecidiar doctrine, are no less singular than amusing, and more 

 extraordinary than the absurdity Lord Bolingbroke complains of. Ma- 

 homet, for instance, who understood human nature as well if not better 

 than any uninspired person, gravely declared that women had no souls. 

 And JMonboddo, who says he knew the world, contends that men are 

 only monkies who have rubbed away their tails ! ! A grave Spanish 

 writer I have heard of, makes this theory more probable, by actually 

 proving that the Jews had once tails ! There is no assertion, however 

 absurd, that will not be believed by some simple-hearted, unsophis- 

 ticated people, who think their system as they speak their language, 

 and dislike the trouble of translating either the one or the other. It was 

 precisely so at all events with Harold Bearfoot, who having taken it 

 into his head that his brother was afraid of his nephew — slept upon the 

 idea, and could have sworn with a clear conscience to its truth when 

 he awoke. 



Winterton's sisters were soon busied in the clipping and cutting of 

 linen, calico, muslin, and the necessary equipments for India ; his kind, 

 good-natured mother, the very personification of Lady Bountiful, stowed 

 chests of conserves, and hordes of tongues, hams, and pickles, away for 

 his use, enough to stock an Indiaman; Avhile his father rang a succession 

 of changes on Sir Basil's jealousy, the governor-generalship of India, 

 and the respectability (for that was his favourite phrase) of the Bear- 

 foots. 



" God bless you, my dear boy ! do not forget to wear your flannels 

 on board ship," sobbed the tender and kind mother. The sisters wept 

 also ; not that Winterton was beloved by any of them, for sycophants, 

 at home, are always selfish, making up for their out-of-door suavity, by 

 in-door austerity. But the idea of parting, even with the dog that 

 worries, excites, for the moment, something approaching to regret. 

 Besides, it was right to be sorrowful, and their tears were mixed with 

 certain tender memoranda, as they pressed cheek to cheek in the great 

 hall. " Winterton, you will not surely forget the cornelian." " Win- 

 terton, tlie carved fan." " Oh, brother ! you surely will remember the 

 ivory work-box." " Winterton," sobbed forth Julia, the youngest, and 

 consequently the most natural of the family, as she climbed up his knees, 

 and circled her little arms round his neck — " dear Winterton, come 

 back soon, and bring me my parrot." His father had made his adieus in 

 what was called — certainly without any reason — the library ; but as liis 

 instructions were perfectly disregarded by his son, and not likely to be 

 of much use to any one, there is no necessity, that I know of, for re- 

 j)eatlng them here. One thing is certain — that wlien I\Irs. IJearfoot en- 

 tt^red the room, more than an hour after her son's departure, she saw 



