1826. ] Letter on Affairs in general. 531 
well'as our feelings. “One silk gown [reads] —one fly cap—one pet- 
tiédat—one apron—reminants will be shewn in court. Now these things, 
sentlémen jury—are-things. * People—sell fish—not to illtreat people 
that buy it—abuse, ard ’comfisticate °em with impunity.” 
“O'Blarney—“ Imipunity, my Lord—they set us’ in the ‘stocks for two 
houtson'a market day.” =" 
‘0 Frump._“It was before you were put in the stocks youbroke the peace.” 
O’ Blarney.“ My lord, Tl prove that it was after.” 
Mr. Justice B****,.« I'll take it, Mr. O’Blarney, that it was both.” 
Crier.—* ‘Silence in the Court!” 
‘Mr. Single-Brief (junior for plaintiff.) —“ Grizzle Tomkins! Call 
Grizzle Tomkins!—Your lordship has an abstract ? This, my lord, is 
thé plaintiff’s housekeeper, who heard all that passed.” 
‘Witness put into the box. 
O’Blarney (for defendant).—« My lord, I wish to ask Mrs. Tomkins a 
question on the voir dire.” ; 
Witness sworn. 
O'Blarney.—“ Now, attend to me ma'am. My learned friend has 
said that you heard all that passed: I ask—can you hear one word of 
any thing that is said to you?” 
Frump (Sergt.)—“ My lord—if she can’t hear, what’s the use of the 
learned counsel’s' putting the question” 
’O'Blarney.—* Och! you'll allow me, Mr. Sergeant, if you please— 
the witness is in my hands.—Now, Mrs. Tomkins, listen (calling) Are 
you not deaf?” 
Witness (bawling)—“ Ye-e-s.” 
Mr. Single-Brief—*« Why, my lord, that answer is a proof she is not 
deaf.” ’*' 5 
Frump (Sergt.)—*« My lord, we'll call another witness. Call Monsieur 
Chardon!” ' 
“Javelin man (without—calls).—“< Mr. Jordan!” 
“O’Blarney (for defendant).—*< My Jord, Iam sorry to take so many 
objections, but I must ask this witness a question on the voir dire.” 
“Mr. Justice B¥***—*« Put your question, Mr. O’Blarney.” 
O’Blarney.—* M. Chardon, you are a Frenchman ? 
Witness.—*< Oh oui, Monsieur, je suis Francois.” 
- O’Blarney.—“ Why then Sir, I ask you—remember you are on your 
oath—what is the nature of your religious belief ?” 
Witness.—“ Monsieur? Vraiment, Monsieur—religion? I am not 
particulier, Monsieur—I am un tailleur.” 
- O'Blarney—*“ My lord, this person is incompetent. We have no 
means of swearing a tailor.” 
ae Single-Brief-—“ Why not ? He may be sworn upon the ‘ pattern- 
book,’ “if you please.” ; 
“O'Blarney.—« He is but the ninth part of a man.” (Laughter) 
_ Frump (Sergt.)—* In that case, the oath is just nine times as binding 
upon’ ‘him ‘as upon any body else.” 
* Crier!_=«Silencé in the Court!” 
O'Blarhey:—< My lord, I submit that his trade constitutes an objec- 
tion ; persons of his calling have a belief of their own. The poet says, 
«igh Pi ——Hell! The tailor fears not hell! 
ej He keeps the key ; and o’er the mouth, — 
mo Cross-legged, in aoe Hue 
ADO 23 
