[ 70 ] [July, 



highways amd byways ; or, the autobiogbaphy of 

 mr. jonathan wild, the younger. 



It has long been a favourite hypothesis of mine, that a great man — 

 and what is a felon but a conqueror, exercising his predatory faculties on 

 a confined sphere of action ? — is bound, before death, to give his memoirs 

 to the world, as some compensation for that peculiar ingenuity by which, 

 through life, he has entitled himself to its respectful abhorrence. Acting 

 upon this principle — the most disinterested that can influence an impre- 

 judiced mind — I hasten to present the public with an autobiographical 

 sketch, whose chief merits — to say nothing of its other ethical capabi- 

 lities — are its strict truth, sound moral, and unflinching integrity of pur- 

 pose. With this hint, I commence my narrative. 



I was born in the year 179 — , in a cow-shed, during a shower, near the 

 little Irish village of Ballyshannon. JMy father was an itinerant vender 

 of books — my mother a washer-woman, and grand-daughter of the 

 never-to-be-forgotten Jonathan Wild, whose nearest relations, after the 

 sad catastrophe that befell that great but eccentric genius,* resolved to 

 fly an ungrateful coimtry, and civilize the more congenial provinces of 

 Ireland. With this view they came over, to the number of five, to 

 Ballyshannon, from which place one, by means anything but miraculous, 

 was speechly transferred to Botany Bay ; another died of a broken heart 

 in the county jail ; a tliird fell a victim to a severe cold, caught, while 

 gazing at one of the prettiest prospects in all Ireland, from a damp pil- 

 lory ; a fourth got his head accurately divided into two distinct depart* 

 ments, by his dearest and best friend, at a wedding ; while the fifth, a lady 

 of infinite whim and vivacity, espoused my father, the respected merchant 

 above-mentioned. Of this last individual I must here pause, and say a 

 few words. He was a wild, rambling character, full of fun, frolic, and 

 whisky; endowed with principles that sat gracefully and easily upon 

 him, like an old coat ; and of so restless a temperament, that, except 

 wh6n in the stocks — an accident to which the most unexceptionable 

 moralist is at times liable — he was never known to remain more than 

 tlu'ee days in the same place. From this father I inherit all that is sound 

 in my moral, and talented in my intellectual character. He it was who 

 first induced me to read, imbued me with a love of enterprise and petty 

 larceny, taught me to " cast off the shackles thrown around the mind" 

 (so the venerable old gentleman used to express himself) " by priest- 

 craft and despotism," to consider man and woman as the lawful victims 

 of my superior address, and to peruse attentively, and with a view to 

 their practical application, the independent sallies of Tom Paine. I 

 should mention, perhaps, that this highly-accomplished parent was one 

 of that numerous horde of Irishmen Avho, during the Rebellion of '98, 

 distinguished themseb es by their impartial robberies of Orangeman and 

 Papist. In consequence of his exertions on this occasion, strengthened, 

 no doubt, by the ftict of a Protestant officer's purse being found in his 

 waistcoat-pocket, my father, together with twelve others of the same 

 stamp, was discovered, early one fine November morning, swinging from 

 the lamp-post of the bridge at Wexford ; a mishap which my mother 

 took so grievously to heart, that she was seen, a few days afterwards, 

 stretched lifeless on her husband's grave. Whisky and strong affection 

 had been too much for her : she was always delicate and sensitive. 

 • He had the misfortune to be hanged : vide Fielding's Life of him. 



