42(^ Xoiei of the Month on [Oct. 



indolence, it was rather unlucky that the Englishman should have 

 learned nothincr from him but his taste for opium. We wish that 

 IMahmoud would v.rite a book — he would be as well employed as if he 

 had been scribbling notes to Mr. Curtis, and other blick cloaked and 

 pious correspondents of his Grace. What an animated account must he 

 not give of the benefits of the alliance of England ! First, a knot of no- 

 torious banditti among his subjects, bribed by the money of his noto- 

 rious enemy, break out into rebellion ; the banditti are hanged, routed, 

 and beaten into mire in the first month, and there they must have re- 

 mained, but for whom ? — Avhy, his dearest, oldest, most devoted, and 

 magnanimous ally. The whigs declare that Greece is ail one jMarathon 

 or Thermopylae ; that poets, orators, and indescribable geniuses are run- 

 ning to seed in every corner of this deii of thieves ; and that a national 

 sul"»scription, national agents, and national levies, are the true national 

 offering, from a people who have been flogged from five years old to 

 twenty, into turning Euripides into nonsense. — The Turks send out 

 horse and foot ; tliey find their ally in the front of the enemy's line : 

 they send out a flset; they find tliemselves battled by their allj', their 

 ships burnt, their coasts left bare, tlieir commerce torn up ])y the roots ; 

 and they are consoled by seeing the Rus.sian bear hugging the British , 

 flag. The Russians pour down upon their fields ; a fleet follows, sup- 

 plies the march with men and musquets, batters their forts about their 

 ears, and blocks up the Bosphorus ; and where is the ally all the 

 while ? — magnanimously, with his hands in his pockets, lolling in his 

 easy chair, and reading the Court IMartial upon a Sir Something Cod- 

 rington, a poor devil, whom one ministry turned into a cat's paw, and 

 another into a screen. We may not easily conceive the writhing of the 

 IMussulraan inoustachios while those paragraphs are rushing from his im- 

 perial pen. However he will have little else to do in future, and unless 

 he takes a constable's pole, and mounts the '■' neat blue uniform" in the 

 new gendarmerie, he may as Avell write his memoirs for the benefit of 

 posterity. 



But if this war prostrates the IMussulman, and puts an end to the 

 foolery of supposing that the Strathfieldsay dj'uasty is fit for saving any 

 thing but its own shillings, it will furnish at least a new grand tour for 

 our travellers. And at tliis we unequivocallj^ rejoice. We have for these 

 ten years been sick of Italy ; and turned with loathing from " orange 

 groves, casinos, and prima donnas." Germany is, in the bibliopolist 

 phrase, an absolute drug, and of course had a legitimate right to make 

 any one sick who attempted to swallow any thing on the subject. His 

 Highness of Saxe Cobourg goes as far in the way of a German produc- 

 tion as any thing we ever desire to see ; and Ave could live for ever with- 

 out a line on sour krout and the beer drinking brutes of the German 

 colleges. But let our travellers run over to Asia IMinor ; they will now 

 be neither sacrificed nor circumcised; their passport will not come in 

 the shape of a dagger, nor their welcome in the sublime pilfering of 

 purse and person by a pasha. 



The march of the Russians is in itself a fine piece of geography. 

 "' General Paskewitsch started from the western foot of INIonnt Ararat, with 

 a multitude of Armenians whom the Grand Seignor's persecutions had made 

 brave. Diadiu is in his power. This place is a miserable boroug-h, with a 

 fortress and towers, and which commands the eastern stream of the Euphrates, 

 whose waters run between two rocky and steep banks. The Kurds, who 

 occupy this country, being informed that the sultan had turned giaour, by 



