MISCELLANEOUS ESSAYf^. 



39(t 



tiier the mention of Mr. Courtly's 

 carbuncle was not unconstitutional. 

 As we are all old fellows, and have 

 pretty well lived over the petulance 

 and heyday of passion, these re- 

 straints bear less hard upon us, and 

 forfeits become every day less fre- 

 quer.t nniong us J irisomuch that we 

 are likely soon to be forced upon 

 some regular contribiuions, in place 

 of the fines from which we have hi- 

 therto drawn our. support, t am 

 in hopes we shall at last bring our 

 plan to that state of perfection, that 

 a breach of any statute will stand 

 upon our records as a remarkable 

 occurrence. 



The first visit of a new member 

 is a spectacle diverting enough, and 

 it is generally a full half-year before 

 we can shape him and clip him to 

 our standard. It is now about tluee 

 years since squire Blunt bought a 

 large estate in our neighbourhood ; 

 and, during the first twelve months, 

 we heard of nothing but this gen- 

 tleman's quarrels aijd litigations. 

 As I sometimes walk in his chesnut 

 groves to meditate upon matter for 

 the entertainment of my vvotthy 

 readers, I have been twice indicted 

 for a trespass, and for breaking 

 down his pailings in pursuit of 

 game ; and, happening one day to 

 take a telescope out with me, I was 

 threatened with a prosecution for 

 carrying a gun on his manor. 



As it is looked upon as some ho- 

 nour to be of our society, this rough 

 gentleman was suddenly seized with 

 an unaccountable inclination to be- 

 come a member ; and it was asto- 

 nishing to every body, that after 

 being well apprised of the inconveni- 

 ence ami rigour of our institution, 

 and his own inability to perform the 

 engagement of it, his ambition 

 leemed no wise discouraged, and 



he still persisted in his design of 

 proposing himself. As we have a 

 certain term of probation, wc rarely 

 refuse to any body above the age 

 of fifty (*v,'hich is the ajre of admis- 

 sipu), the favour of a trial. The 

 following is a list of Mr. Blunt's 

 forfeits in the black book.' 



1st day— Endured his own silence 

 so long, that he fell asleep. 

 On being awakened at the 

 hour of separation, swore a 

 grea't oath, and paid a guinea. 



2d day — Had three shillings worth 

 of superlatives, and a sixpenny 

 whistle ; besides paying a 

 crown to the echo. 



Sd day — Offered to lay a bottle 

 that he would eat two hundred 

 oyste!-s, and paid five shillings : 

 — went to sleep for the rest of 

 tlie evening. 



5th day — Called for a song, and 

 paid a shilhng instead ; nine 

 shillings and sixpence for dis- 

 turbing the echo ; paid thirty 

 shillings and six-pence for con- 

 tumacy, and swore himself to 

 Coventry. 



Here there was an interval of 

 some months, during which our no- 

 vice absented himself. We were 

 surprized, however, one day, with 

 his company, after we had given 

 him up as irreclaimable. He ap- 

 peared indeed to bring with him a 

 disposition greatly corrected, and 

 actuiilty incurred only two forfeit* 

 the vt'hole evening ; namely, for 

 bursting into a horse-laugh on Mr. 

 Sidcbottom's missing his chair, and 

 giving Mr. Barnaby a slap on the 

 back that raised the echo, and i 

 violent fit of coughing. ' Since this 

 time lie has been t\Vice off and on, 



but 



