MISCELLANEOUS ESSAYS. 



943 



the time, and reflection always 

 -• comes too late. However, the 

 '' soothingsoundsofthemusic, which 

 " was remarkably fine, and every 

 " eye fixed, not on mc, as I sup- 

 *' posed \vould be the case, but on 

 '' the orchestra ; the awful silence 

 *' thai reigned during a beautiful 

 " solo oil the violoucello ; the at- 

 ^' tention and tranqniliitj that the 

 " hearers' countenances expressed, 

 " which formed a striking contrast 

 *' to the expressive pleasure that 

 " animated the performers' eyes 

 *' and features ; the elegant dccora- 

 " tions of the room, and judicious 

 *' distribution of the lights, which 

 *' likewise rivetted my attention, 

 *' calmed the tempest that raged in 

 " my bosom, and made m.e forget 

 *' my last blunder, sooner. than I 

 " had done my former ones. 



" The duke turned his head 

 " round once or twice, and I fancied 

 ^' he looked at mc, and that his 

 " countenance expressed displca- 

 " sure. My perturbed imagination 

 *' immediately suggested the idea, 

 " that he was ofieudcd at the im- 

 ^' proper liberties I had taken, and 

 " the ennue I had occasioned him. 

 *' For, at that moment,! was far from 

 " supposing that more important 

 " concerns had probably oblite- 

 " rated every trace of mc from his 

 " mind; and that, had my manners 

 " been as polished as they were the 

 '* reverse, he would have remeni- 

 " bered them as little us he did my 

 " awkwardness. I reviewed my past 

 " conduct with shame and indigna- 

 " tion, and could not conceive how 

 " it was possible for mc to act and 

 " speak in the thoughtless, stupid, 

 " and incoherent manner 1 had 

 " done. 



" Was the same opportunity to 

 " olfer again, said 1 to myself, I 



*' am certain I should conduct my- 

 " self in a very different manner. 

 " How easily could I have made a 

 " polite reply to that compliment, 

 " — given a pertinent answer to 

 " that question, — introduced this 

 " and that witty thought, — and 

 " could I not, without any impro- 

 " pricty, have given a ditlerent 

 " turn to the conversation, which 

 " would have enabled me to intro- 

 " duce the ideas that I had so care- 

 " fully collected in my mind, and 

 " which are now entirely lost ! 



" These dismal reflections were 

 " sometimes interrupted by the rc- 

 " collection of the enjoyments 

 " that awaited me at my return to 

 " my friend Thompson, and I com- 

 " forted myself with the thought, 

 " that his conversation and supper 

 '' would make me amends for all 

 " my disappointments and suffer- 

 " ings, and 1 alternately listened to 

 " the music, and the heavy shower 

 " of rain that rattled against the 

 " windows. JMuch as I knew that 

 " rain was wanted, and heartily as 

 '• I had joined Avith my friend in 

 " wishing for it at dinner time, yet 

 '' I cannot say the sound was 

 " agreeable to me at that moment; 

 " and how I should get home was 

 " a fresh source of uneasiness to 

 " my agitated mind. 



" The concert was over about 

 " nine o'clock ; every body left the 

 " room, and I slowly followed the 

 " crowd. Had I been lucky enough 

 " to have met with the bustling se« 

 " cretary, he would prol)ably have 

 " lent me a great coat, and ushered 

 " me out of the castle. He pro- 

 " mised to come to mc again before 

 " the concert was finished ; but he 

 " was too consequential a person, 

 *' and had always so much of some- 

 " thir.g like business on his hands, 



" that 



