178 IHELIFEOF 



and the knife would not enter ; but I K-^peat^d 

 the ftroke lower down, and plunged ic ».»-^o the 

 handle in my body. Thofe about me v^^ere 

 Ihocked and aftoniflied, and feemcd incapabiv'e 

 of thought or adion, till Mr. Kirby drew the 

 knife from my breaft, and I dcfircd them to 

 help me off wath my coat, which being done, I 

 calmly laid down. 



I by Ao means intend tojuftify the violent adl 

 I committed, but I was driven to defpair, by 

 the unaccountable condu6l of the fiierifts. It 

 feems they have the privilege oi feh^iing the 

 perfo'ns, who are to compofe the number or- 

 dered by the Secretary of State to be fent off; 

 and for reafons which are yet unknown to me, 

 they had refolved not only to fend me away, but 

 to take me unwares in the lingular manner I 

 have already defcribed. To take me unawares^, 

 was the only method in their power to diftrefs 

 me; and of this they determined to profit, well 

 knowing that from my extenfivecorrefpondence 

 with the molt dift-inguilhed perfons at home, 

 and on the Continent, I mufr, if taken by fur- 

 prife, leave many papers which I highly cfleem- 

 ed at their mercy. I mull befides be unpro- 

 vided with fo much as a change of linen, till 

 \\\z\r great humanity might be pleafed to order 

 me fome of my own little ftock. But above all, 

 they well knew that I mull: leave thofe who are 



dearer 



